defends: ⊰ 5.01 ⊱ (ɪ ᴡᴀɴɴᴀ sᴛᴀʏ ɪɴsɪᴅᴇ ᴀʟʟ ᴅᴀʏ)
[personal profile] defends
So. Step one? I ask questions. Step two? You, whoever you are, entity or non-entity or seven-legged centi-snake-a-demon-ity, get with the splainy. I'm on a tight schedule and my tolerance for crap is pretty much, on a scale from face-punching to hugs and puppies, in or around the lethal level of low, so the faster you spit some details the less likely I am to go all Mission Impossible-slash-every-Jackie-Chan-movie-ever on you. Where am I, who's in charge… We can start with the basics and work our way up to the hard-hitting stuff if that's more your style.

That, or we can go fists first, questions later. But my mom taught me that manners matter. So I'm giving you a chance. One, and only one, chance. Because I've had enough being trapped in unsavory places for an entire lifetime in just the last week, and I'm not really feeling too sunny and bright and snuggly about this.

Oh! Almost forgot – if you see a kid running around here getting herself into steaming piles of trouble, and her name happens to be Dawn? Don't touch her. Just send her to me. If something happens to her, rest assured, I will find you. And you won't like what happens after.
rulebreaks: (pic#1385294)
[personal profile] rulebreaks
[A scene very similar to this one plays out on the street in front of the camera. Cue Buffy looking mucho uneasy.]

You've got to be freaking kidding me. Again?
rulebreaks: (denim)
[personal profile] rulebreaks
[Buffy blinks a few times, as if she doesn't recognize the comm unit for a moment. Her hair is pulled up, hastily, and her clothing is in fact, Sesame Street pyjamas :| ]

This place owes me a super-party, no skimp on the ice cream. Though, with the admitting? It did get with some rare good timing. Minus the obvious malfunctioning of the wardrobe variety. [She sighs, brushing some hair out of her face - she looks tired. Something she usually wouldn't let show on her face.

There's a pause, and a soft false start then,]
You City-ers know the drill, any apocalypti since I've been gone? Single file if you don't mind getting updatey...

Oh, and I'm called ma'am now. So, that's a thing.
[identity profile]
So I've never really done this coming out thing before. I've had it, you know, done to me. ..Bad. Bad choice in words. All of them.

I'm starting over. I'm a vampire slayer. Full disclosure sort of thing, from now on. That's me - full disclosure girl. You can count on me for all your Needs. Yeah.

Actually where I come from I'm kind of the vampire slayer. The Chosen... one. Or two, sometimes. It's complicated. I think it's pretty well mootish but there were a few vampires around here last I ...not that I check. That's not what I do here, so.

If anyone weird approaches those of you who might be undeadly inclined, just. Let me know? Not so I can get with the violence or anything. It's actually more a protect-a-you thing than protect-a-him.

Wow. I really never thought I'd be saying that. It's kind of ironic, isn't it? I mean-- you don't care. Um. Thanks.

hexappeal: (durrrrrrr.)
[personal profile] hexappeal
[The video opens on Buffy and Zatanna dressed as if they're attending the event of the year... with an entourage of shirtless men behind them. They're standing in front of a counter at what appears to be a 7-11, snacks and slurpees spread-out before them. Zatanna seems to be at the end of a heated argument with the cashier.] Anyway, they don't have any shirts. It's unfair to punish them for that.

[The cashier ignores Zatanna and throws an arm out toward Buffy, asking her to put on her shoes, which happen to be in her arms. She's now browsing the refrigerated section and shoots back:] I'm holding them, it's the same. They're with me!

[And Buffy returns with a pudding cup and plastic spoon, placing both on the counter. The cashier gives them the stink eye, but rings them up, anyway. Slurpees and more doughnuts than they could possibly eat in their hands, they exit the building and it becomes clear that they're in Las Vegas (which explains who those shirtless guys are, but not why they're with them).]

Um. So, we'll be back soon. Today, possibly. [Or maybe tomorrow. Or the next day.]

And we wanted you guys to know we aren't dead... yet. Hi, everyone! [Buffy waves enthusiastically as the feed ends.]

[ooc: PURPLE is Zatanna and PINK is Buffy! They've both been gone since early afternoon on the 13th and have barely been on the Network.]
[identity profile]
[She spent a moment or two pacing before she remembered the thing was recording. Whoops.]

I've looked everywhere. Even like, in the Atlantic Ocean.

She's been ported out. My sister, Dawn.

[The video cuts out. And there's some feedback. Just when it seems like the transmission has ended Buffy's voice comes back.]

It's always like this. Gain something? Lose something else. It's not fair. And why does it always have to be an important something. That's just adding injury to.. injury!

I feel like I've abandoned her all over again.


Hank, I guess um. She won't be going to Xavier's in the Fall. Sorry for wasting your time.
[identity profile]
[The video opens in Boffy's new apartment, but. She'll get to that.]

I forget to do this thing a lot: the updatey thing. I think because once I'm on camera I get a little freezy and forget what I...was going to say.


Oh! Right, so.... Look at this. [She picks up a puppy, who looks lazy and kind of sleepy but he manages a half-bark. Buffy sticks him under her arm.] I mean him. I was thinking... Sebastian? Does that make anyone else think of crabs?

[oh right, puts the dog down, pans around her living room.]

So this is my new place. Totally fit with burglar alarms so don't get any ideas. My hamburgers are off-limits.


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