ioudas: (well that sucks)
[personal profile] ioudas
[ When the comm flicks on, the first thing in view is the familiar form of, well, the Shade. In his usual dapper clothing, the top hat and all, but he’s leaning forward against what is, beyond a shadow of a doubt, a bar. One gloved hand idly drags itself back and forth across the polished wood, and it’s practically glimmering under the low lights and candles they have set up around the place. Behind him is Cross, who looks quite the opposite who is sitting on polished hardwood floors and staring at a set up of something or the other. It’s not really come together, but the way that he stares at it is obviously not healthy. Or when he gets up and moves something a little to the right and then sits back down again to stare at it again. Timcampy, at some point gets bored of this too and opts that Shade’s tophat is better than Cross’ head. Shade, who dips slightly from the weight, quirks his eyebrows, and then looks up, like he can see the thing, even if he can’t. If anything, he looks more annoyed than anything else, like he has been suffering this sort of thing for far too long already. ]

You know, of all the troubles that come into owning a business, I did not think that this would be it. [ And he tips his head back at Cross, at whom Shade is obviously getting a bit annoyed with. He isn’t really a people person, okay. ] I’m not suited for this sort of work, you know. [ Obviously more at Cross than the camera. ]

You’re the one that insists on babysitting me. [He says it as if he’s not actually present in the room, moving to stand on the bar to reach over things to finish off what seems to be a drawing of a Lion’s head. Therefore, he has to make sure that their liquor lines up. He has fake bottles filled with the terrible stuff he’s been drinking (it’s under a grand, that qualifies as terrible) and keeps moving back and forth.]

Because if I didn’t then this would have been a waste of an investment before we even opened.

[There’s just a look cast in his direction, as if Shade knows that Cross didn’t get this place legally. With Bond gone, it just so happened that they were the two people left with this fine establishment.]

I don’t care what you say, a cast iron, fire breathing lion in front of our club would be amazing.

[He might have already started work on that. What Shade doesn’t know won’t hurt him and if anyone else asks, he’ll dodge the question.] Also, why are you advertising? It’s not polite to spy on a lady while she gets ready, you know.

For workers, Cross. They need to be licensed and trained, don’t they? I’m certainly not the one who’s going to be running this place. That sounds suspiciously like a lot of work, and I’m retired, remember?

[ He waves a hand at the camera, as if that spoke enough about it. It wasn’t like Shade was going to be serving people. If anything, he wanted to simply make a killing on what they made from it. ] I shouldn't be expected to work, these days.

[Cross isn’t listening, he’s up to trying to make whatever it is that he’s working on to be symmetrical. In fact, he climbs over Shade’s brand new bar to do so.]

Cross! Please try to restrain yourself?

It’s not symmetrical, it’s going to look like some dumb kid did it.

You’re obsessed. Leave it, and help me find some people to actually do the work.

Like hell I’m going to let any person touch this. [Don’t you want to work for these great gentleman? Even while they bicker, the bottles start moving, pools of black either moving them out of place, or in the case of one, it falls to the ground, but doesn’t shatter. It just lands with a soft thunk, ] I have to start all over again!

[Being the mature adult Cross is, he throws a bottle at Shade’s head. Shade simply creates a portal and teleports to the other side of the room while the camera gets knocked off by Timcampy’s fat butt.]

[ooc: shade and cross]
professorlionface: (Most excellent! :3)
[personal profile] professorlionface
[The camera clicks on to Hank and Cross sitting on a white couch. There's a clear tension between them, as Cross sits with his arms and legs earning his namesake, while Hank has an elbow propped on the armrest, chin in his hand and eyes rolling upward. He has a small remote in his other hand.]

I'm telling you that they will tell you that it's a terrible idea. Unless we're in a city of morons- which means I'm disregarding their opinions because they are morons.

Well, the camera's already rolling, so I'm just going to come out and say it.

[He perks up, looking into the camera and holding his arms out in a welcoming gesture.] Ladies and gentlemen of the City, we have a grand occasion to announce to you all today! You see, this weekend I'll be celebrating my 34th birthday, and we would be delighted if you would deign to join us!


To that end, this Saturday morning, I'd like to invite everyone out to the park for a game of good old fashioned football. It's been perhaps too long since I've tossed around the old pigskin, and whatever some people
[A very unsubtle glance shoots in Cross' direction.] may think of it, I can say with a certainty that we'd have quite a grand time.

[Cross, however, regards this as a chance to show his displeasure by giving a slight sneer and staring at Hank as if he's stuck with some old man.] Oh, yes. Nothing says "Happy Birthday" than running around with a ball and performing what can only be described as the most mundane thing ever contrived. Why do something fun like have a huge party celebrating yet another year that you have managed to defeat the forces of nature and stay alive? At least let me put in an open bar for the rest of us.

[Hank turns to face him, his brows knitting a sweater.]

You do realize how impractical a full-service bar would be in a park, don't you? I told you, we can bring a cooler!

[Almost too quick a response, Cross scoffs:] Yes, because everything about me screams practical. Just tell him that his opinion is dumb and let me get back to putting together a party that people will actually have fun at.

[Hank turns right back to the camera with a giant grin.] Now with an added bonus! We'll give you each one free shot at taking us both down. Him especially. [Because guess which one isn't built like a mountain.

For a moment Cross stares at him, completely stoic before he starts to chuckle. From a chuckle to a laugh, for a laugh to something that causes him to almost fall of the sofa, he's laughing so hard. It takes him a moment or two before he can regain composure, wiping a tear from his eye.
] That's hilarious. If you wanted to watch me backhand idiots across the mouth, you should have just said so. It'll be my gift to you.

Ah ah ah, "free shot" means without defense or reprisal! You want to give me a gift, I'd say just go along with the game and keep an eye out for the forward tackle!

[With that, he hits a button on his remote and the recording ends.]

blue is hank, red is cross, of course

(text.)

May. 7th, 2013 07:21 pm
ioudas: (condescending)
[personal profile] ioudas
❝ the lord will fulfill his purpose for me; your steadfast love, o lord, endures forever. do not forsake the work of your hands. ❞
psalms


do you actually believe that, though? do you believe in destiny or do you believe that it is our own? discuss.

also, since we're having a deep conversation. google would have made my life a whole lot easier if it had existed in the 1800s. then again there would not be young men saying that they love vintage victorian erotica more than the mainstream kind (here's a hint: it's still erotica).

if you're a really old guy wearing a hood over your head, you owe me a saturday night for the one you ruined. cash only.

(ooc: sorry, this got really NSFW)
ioudas: (hither)
[personal profile] ioudas
(timestamp is 2AM in the middle of some underground club; there are people cheering in various dialects, and there's a guy on the floor bleeding. there's a kid holding onto cross' shirt, he must have hit a button on his communicator (cross is still a busybody).

it's not that hard to miss cross, he still has that bright red hair that's up in a ponytail that's actually showing off a bunch of strange tattoos and stranger scars all over his body. his back is always to the kid, as if he's trying to hide this side of himself from another call for challengers, and a huge farmer steps up.

one

two

three

ding!

the young girl drops cross' coat to start cheering for him and the feed ends.
)

(video.)

Mar. 2nd, 2013 07:45 pm
ioudas: <user name="jotunheim"> (pic#5411245)
[personal profile] ioudas
You know, there have been times that I have just wanted to drop everything and run away. Not that our last visit that lovely little city wasn't fun, but nothing says fun like being ported into a city in a towel while you're trying to do your hair.

(he says it like he's trying to ignore the fact that timcampy, while bigger, is choking him with his tail.)

Or making certain people really clingy- I really should set up a guardian system for him just in case I get ported out without him. (he pats him slightly, but really he's just trying to breathe.) Not that I'd ever leave him behind.

But, I digress- if you could honestly drop everything and run off in the night? Where would you go? Usually, I'd say the United States but it was a lot different in the 19th Century. India, always mystical, I got a great discount everywhere. For me, Japan I would think, since where I'm from Japan isn't exact habitable anymore. I'm actually quite curious.

(voice.)

Jan. 25th, 2013 09:24 pm
ioudas: (Default)
[personal profile] ioudas
(ignoring any events that might have transpired between him and a certain bond villain, cross actually sounds bored.)

If you were to lose half your face, how would you do it? Personally, I favor the angry ex-husband but ... (there's actually an angry ex-husband in the city so...) you know, stuff gets stale.

Or, the little brats at the Institute could stop asking me about it and actually focus on trying not to fail spectacularly that would be fantastic.

(he hesitates a beat:)

Also, Lenalee Lee and Vesper Lynd have been ported out. I suppose if you're sixteen years old and want some clothes, I'll send them right over.

(video.)

Dec. 5th, 2012 06:21 pm
ioudas: (well damn)
[personal profile] ioudas
(ignore the fact that there's a mac desktop that has a huge bite out of it and there's a huge gold ball chewing on it. Also, ignore the fact that there are scorch marks all across his wall.)

Question - well, really questions: does anyone know of a lab or something I can turn into a workstation because really I can't handle this fatty eating everything. (though Timcampy stops chewing on what was a monitor and throws it up on Cross' lap, not before slapping something that's in his lap that -- well, growls. Snarls even.)

Don't make me put you two in timeout. And two, he swallowed something that he shouldn't have and for the life of me, I can't get him to throw up. Any ideas?

filtered to lilian! )
apostled: (o53)
[personal profile] apostled
( Lenalee's not so good at figuring out technology stuff yet (she's really trying!). She's out in the garden of the penthouse that Cross got them, trying to call Cross and accidentally accessing the video function. As she walks through the garden, fiddling with the device, she finds Cross which... makes it easier than trying to call him. )

Ah! General Cross.  ( She knows he asked her to call her him Cross in public but it's harder to do at in private. She's still clutching the phone in both her hands (it makes for a good anxiety reliever when dealing with Cross) and not realizing the video is on. )  I... well. I noticed you used the Millenum Earl's name when signing the papers for the penthouse.  ( Her face is so nervous and concerned. )  Don't you think he'll be upset with us if he shows up here?  ( She's such an optimist. )

They're upset that humanity still lives and breathes to see another day, they're upset that we took their ark, they're upset at every little thing. Honestly, Lenalee, if they can kill our comrades and try to wipe out humanity for the past 7000 years, we can ruin their credit a bit.

( None of that is reassuring and she looks very shocked and terrified of this news. )  But there's not enough of us to fight them if they get upset about this! We're the only ones with anti-akuma weapons!

( Cross looks nervous for a moment before shrugging it off. )  And they're not here, why push it?

( Except Lenalee is more persistent than that, and now she just look's determined. )  Then... I want you to teach me! Like you did Allen. In case they do come... I want to become better!

I don't think it's a good idea if I train you, there's a reason why Allen is as good as an Exorcist as he is, and there's a reason why he whines.

I can handle it! I'm stronger now. I can do it.

( And this is Cross. Slowly... edging towards the edge of the building. )  I suppose if you're that eager to be the only Innocence user here, we should get started right away.  ( and this is Cross FLINGING HIMSELF OFF THE EDGE OF THE BUILDING DESPITE THEM BEING IN THE PENTHOUSE

Lenalee's trained for fast responses and she drops the phone on the ground as her anklets turn into dark red (almost black boots) that go up her thighs. She runs to the ledge and jumps and both are out of frame for a short while.

Eventually Lenalee and Cross reappear at the edge of the frame, her carrying him as she lands back on the ground and drops him before falling to her own hands and knees, taking deep breaths. She reaches to grab her phone on the ground and pauses when she has it, eyes wide before looking over at him.
)

Only user?

( Her fingers finally hit the button to turn the device off. )

( ooc: lenalee is normal and red is the ginger general )

(text.)

Oct. 13th, 2012 01:49 pm
ioudas: (well damn)
[personal profile] ioudas
(no way is he actually going to show that he's being an adult and let people associate him with that gross stuff!!)

... so, right i've gone through this and there is no way that this will not sound terrible, context does me no good: but what's the sort of stuff that a sixteen year old girl need?

i'd shop for her, but pretty sure if i picked out anything she'd look like me only smaller. plus, she's too small to fit into any of my shirts and i'm a bloody giant so it rules out pants on my end. so, if any of you girls can help lenalee out, i'd appreciate it. maybe i'll pay you or something. whatever.


encrypted to shade )


encrypted to zatanna zatara )

encrypted to hank mccoy )

(text.)

Sep. 18th, 2012 08:04 pm
ioudas: (Default)
[personal profile] ioudas
women of the city, since distance equals velocity times time, let's let velocity or time approach infinity, because I want to go all the way with you.

math is cool, kids. also, if you're in my class and i don't get laid tonight, you're all failing.

(voice.)

Jul. 28th, 2012 10:12 pm
ioudas: (Default)
[personal profile] ioudas
Right, so here's the deal. July 31st is either my 211th birthday or my 33rd- give or take 35 years. Either way, I need ideas on what I'm doing because as fun as doing a bar crawl is, the last time I did that I ended up at a monastery in Spain. I'd go into the story, but really it's a very, very long story. So, what is it that you all do in the future do for your birthday?

Regardless, whatever I choose to do, you're all invited. It's no fun celebrating your birthday in the future.

Plus, while I'm here I would like the following things for my birthday:
➝ A lion
➝ A trip to Ireland or India
➝ Apparently you all have perfected the submarine? Yes, I would like that.
➝ And one of those contraptions that let you fly. What's it called, an aeroplane?
Seriously, I would really like a lion.


(ooc; now with more open log!)

(VIDEO.)

May. 13th, 2012 11:42 pm
ioudas: (pic#3143966)
[personal profile] ioudas
(back in the porter room again, here we are. cross is standing in a very nice black suit with red trimming and a gold insignia and even more gold ornaments on his chest. but rather looking the regal general that he should, his hair is in complete disarray, lipstick on his cheek, lips and collar and there's a very expensive bottle of romanee conti on his hand.)

Right, so I was at a conference in Rome regarding - stuff, and there was a very well not fun. So, thank you very much Porter for taking me away but really, she really needs to work on her timing. Don't say that anyone has seen a brunette wearing a suit in the uh, same condition I am?

(a beat:)

Everyone's still here, right? I haven't disappeared for a thousand years and come back to learn that the Earth has been concurred by lemmings or something. Jesus Christ, this is the worst, I'm not drunk enough for this.
ioudas: (Default)
[personal profile] ioudas
(Cross is sitting behind a table, looking irate and his hair is in complete disarray. Suddenly a snake slithers out from his hair and he has to catch it quickly before throwing it on the table.)

I can't believe I actually have to ask this; tell me someone lost a bunch of snakes. It's not fun trying to take a bath only to realize that your tub has snakes in it. And not only that, that your hair is filled with them. This is abso--

(It's as if on cue, Timcampy;; throws up another snake in Cross' lap. Before he can grab it, another man stops him clad in only a towel but looking oh so happy. )

He's very distressed; you don't need to be so rough with him.

Never mind, I found my source (give it a minute; before the communicator turns off) -- Wait, why are you in my apartment?!

(voice.)

Apr. 3rd, 2012 01:25 pm
ioudas: (well hello mr. bond)
[personal profile] ioudas
It seems whenever I want to say something on here, I have to make a list or some sort of agenda. It's a miracle that I remember this after Saint Patrick's Day (speaking of, have I mentioned how much I just love the future for their blatant excuses for drunken debauchery) and waking up in Stein's room. Which, I might need to get you a new bed, I uh, sort of broke the headbo-

But, that's not what I want to say. Madison had recommended me a book on building robots, but I'm really curious. Apart from Einstein giving me excellent pickup lines to use in bars, was there anyone else that published anything new? It can be regarding biology, physics, engineering- anything.

Or if anyone could tell me what a Large Hadron Collider is? Apparently its this huge track underneath Switzerland where they just smash particles together to find a "God" particle? I really wish that the City recognized my credentials as a scientist, I would love to work on these projects. It's - and I don't throw this word around a lot - amazing the strides the future has made in the realms of trying to understand the universe. If it wasn't for kids today, I would actually be proud of you. The future, I mean. Not you.

(video.)

Feb. 23rd, 2012 12:55 pm
ioudas: (well i don't know)
[personal profile] ioudas
[look who is actually pretending to be a catholic by having the ashes form a cross on his forehead - it's what happens when you escape someone by hiding in a church.]

Wow, the last time I said something on this thing I was really, really drunk. So, if I said anything I want to say I'm sorry, but really I'm not.

[he rubs his neck awkwardly, a brand new piercing on his ear indicating what his night was like.] Though, It's probably best that Timcampy ate this thing Monday night because then there would be a repeat of it on Tuesday - not a lot of nunneries around here are there?

Anyway, after I woke up turns out that I actually did the whole Ash Wednesday thing and I might as well do it as half hearted as I do everything. I really care about my relationship to the Lord, do you think he'd approve of not fighting the Skrulls as a sacrifice?

IC EDIT:

MISSING; ONE GOLD GOLEM
gold, spherical, responds to the name Timcampy
image
if found please contact cross marian at xxx-xxx-xxxx


[ooc; u///u please ignore the fact that it's a picture of cross and please assume it's just a picture of just timcampy smiling!!]
ioudas: (Default)
[personal profile] ioudas
[it's not really a glitch, but rather that cross is a horrible texter when he's sober so he's even worse when he's drunk. there's a lot of alcohol to get through on a recent acquisition of his...]

stein i know im drunk at the moment and on a drug lords boat so its even more ironic and whats the word unadviseable i think thats the word whatever but i was thinking of that bolt in your head and i was thinking about how fascinating it is and i just cant stop thinking of all the things that i want to do it and i think im getting excited

(video.)

Dec. 3rd, 2011 11:51 am
[identity profile] breakhisknees.livejournal.com
I don't know what was in that mist, but I caught myself almost cutting off my hair, there were no cigarettes in the apartment or liquor and I smelled like I went to a church. [there's a deliberate sneer as if he would rather shoot himself in the foot.]

So, as far as I can tell, I actually started to behave like a proper member of the church and it made even Timcampy stop eating and smoking. [Though that's been rectified, Timcampy is on Cross's end table with three cigarettes in his mouth.]

So, really consider this a warning, especially if you're married and you happen to have a very good looking wife. Either I will break all ten commandments today or I will embody the 7 Deadly Sins in one go while breaking all ten commandments, we will have to see.

But, if you're planning to come home early, do a fellow import a favor and call? It might get really awkward.
[identity profile] breakhisknees.livejournal.com
[ignore the fact that Cross seems to be hoarding all sorts of things and has effective turned his entire apartment into a pseudolab.]

I figure I should have asked this as soon as I got here. I'm going to have to waste yours and my time with these questions. I'm looking for two sorts of people, really- [a familiar looking gold ball waddles on screen and unhinges his jaw to project images (granted it's one of the Earl from the many times he's tried to kill Cross:]

First are the Noah: grey skinned with crosses across their forehead. They follow this guy, the Earl of Millennium- as you can see, he's fat and ugly. But, unluckily for me, he hates me and the people I work for, but, especially me for some crazy reason. [it's an over exaggeration, but he's being so ~*~noble~*~] So if you're an employee of the Catholic church, I'd probably avoid him.

Secondly, I'm looking for this brat. [Tim switches to showing a picture of Allen Walker] This idiot is my apprentice, Allen Walker. Knowing him, he might be here but he's too technologically inadept to actually figure out the communicators. I really hope that's the case, I really hate paying for stuff myself.

So, yeah, sorry about this all. If you see the first guy, point him in the direction of the park for some laps, if you see the Noah tell them that there are absolutely no Exorcists here. Especially a General. Definitely not. I'd hate to have to actually do work in this place. And lastly, if you see Allen; well tell him that he can't hide for long. If I don't find him, debt will.

(video.)

Sep. 10th, 2011 11:28 pm
[identity profile] breakhisknees.livejournal.com
You know, I never thought that I would say this. Tell someone I make 200 dollars (or pounds) a week and I'm suddenly the most eligible bachelor in the entirety of the England. Then, thrust me in the future and 200 dollars doesn't go as far as I need it to. I guess Lavi is going to have to take the place of Allen, I've never not been able to afford anything.

So, I guess I need to get a job. But, I really don't get this whole "job network" online sort of thing, let alone this "resume" thing. Here's the deal, I've held down every job imaginable: I've been a scientist, I've been a "teacher", an engineer, a factory worker, a guru, a sherpa, a monk-- kind of, it's a very long story involving a Spanish scholar and his very good looking daughter - well, okay, it's not that long of a story- I've been an operative of the Vatican, I've been a "priest", I've been -- well, you get the gist, I've been everything.

If you need someone, I'm looking.


Right, also speaking of things that I don't understand. I'm not really from this century so I have two questions: what's your favorite invention and what on Earth do you usually wear? No one wears a suit anywhere and it's quite distressing.
[identity profile] breakhisknees.livejournal.com
[well hey, there's a bored looking ginger with a mask on half of his face and lighting a cigarello before making a broadcast. he's cut, he's bleeding, but he looks like it's the most boring thing in the world.]

Jesus, you thought that you'd come to the future and there would be some interesting pubs. Right, so, where can a guy find one? [priorities, he has them; especially since it looks like he's bleeding and there's a little gold ball that's rolling around in his hair, his tail sticking up.]

Now, I wonder what the women look like in the future.

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