heavyhanded: (aw come on guys)
[personal profile] heavyhanded
[ oh look, A SADLY EMPTY FRIDGE. there's like a jar of pickles and that's it. it's just the saddest sight in the world. ]

There must be some trick to getting a ten year old [ eleven year old, jaime you are so rude ] to simply stay put. And if she insists on disappearing like some half-sized ghost, must she really take all of my food?

[ A heavy sigh, and Jaime closes the fridge door. He's looking somewhere between irritated and wryly amused when he finally looks down into the comm. ]

What must I buy to convince a Stark that she's better off here, and not... [ He waves a hand dismissively. ] Off getting run down by some yellow carria— cab? [ A thoughtful pause. ] I suppose I might try taking hostage that pig-sticker she calls a sword.

If you see a small, dirty girl that looks as though she might be a boy, do let me know, won't you? I've misplaced mine.
heavyhanded: (scuze me whatchu say)
[personal profile] heavyhanded
[ The interior of a Mac apartment! And Jaime is slumped in a chair, holding what looks like a... solid gold wine bottle, and not looking pleased. ]

I've heard talk of "superpowers" among the imPorts. Perhaps I've found mine. If this is meant to be a blessing, then the gods here play japes just as cruel as the ones I've known in Westeros. [ A wry smile, and he tilts the bottle upside down. Nothing pours out. ] Why, I'd barely even started this bottle.

The banks here will take my coinage gladly enough, do you think they'll take my drink, as well?

[ He peers into the bottle, sighs, and tosses it away with a heavy clunk. ]

It was poor wine, anyway.

01 / Voice.

May. 7th, 2012 12:09 am
heavyhanded: (prince charmingest)
[personal profile] heavyhanded
If I understand this all correctly, I'm meant to speak to this thing, and all manner of people will hear it. Does that count for dark magic? They tell bedside stories to warn children off of things like this, you know. It looks like none of you listened. I'd tell the lot of you to be ashamed, but I find myself suddenly not much better.

[ A pause, and he sounds a little less sardonic and easy, a little more serious. ]

Ser Addam? Strongboar? If either of you are like to… to hear this message, [ and not "read" SO WEIRD ] I'd have your response. Gods help me, I'd even take you, Emmon.

And to anyone that I'd owe introductions, I'm Ser Jaime Lannister, Lord Commander of the Kingsguard. [ A beat. ] Yes, yes, and the Kingslayer, as these metal things insist on reminding me. [ There's a clink of dogtags, a noise of annoyance. ] Someone ought to warn a man that your floating wench's voice means what she says, when she asks after your hero name.

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