Dec. 26th, 2012 07:47 pm
carbonite: (STEAM PUNK)
[personal profile] carbonite
(ignore the fact that there are pugs that are dressed up (pugames bond, bruce puganner and the pugnighter if you must know) judging han. also ignore the fact that han's favorite leather jacket seems to be missing a whole lot of jacket and his pants are slightly singed, the hangar bay seems to have been sort of caught on fire:)

He's definitely gonna kill me this time, I know it. (COUGHING AND BEING MANLY:)

So, as you can tell, me having none of this cheer has probably done something to my fate or whatever it is those specials tell you about the repercussions of not liking the idea of a fat man invading my house and kissing my women- (he's still fucking on this, but he slows down:)

I. (he swallows, like it's really hard for him to say this:) Need help with the ship.

(as if to cement it, something else explodes.)



Dec. 12th, 2012 07:26 pm
carbonite: (EYEBROW RAISE)
[personal profile] carbonite
What is it with you people and this holiday? I don't know whether it was I had grown acclimatized to this sort of torture last year or I've tasted liberation from the constant repetition of the same song over and over again.

You are all aware that that people (the Empire) uses this as torture (which is bad, just in case you didn't know that).

But seriously, what is it about this holiday?


Oct. 29th, 2012 10:33 am
carbonite: (STEAM PUNK)
[personal profile] carbonite
hey, so uh, just in case you're all looking for zatanna za- zee, if you're looking for zee, she's on the falcon. so, uh, if you're her kids, i guess... don't do anything that she won't do?

wait, no.

do everything that she wouldn't do. that's right-right? swear, i'm never ever having kids. ever.

so. yes.

how're all of you?


do me a favor, don't walk around without your mask on? i promise i won't blow anything up in the carrier bay for a week if you don't.


backward technology is fickle.
carbonite: (STEAM PUNK)
[personal profile] carbonite
(Good news everyone! Han's managed to rig the computer systems so that it can synchronize with his communicator on the Falcon. The bad news is that it's showing Vesper throwing Han dirty looks from Leia's a passenger's chair, so unamused that she's actually at a loss for words.)

Don't give me that look, sister. No one told you to follow me on board my ship to start berating me.

And no one told you to start using things that don't work.

I don't know what you're talking about, when I left the Falcon this morning the shield generators were keeping people out and keeping me in, not the other way around.

(Han casts a look at the communicator, taking a good long time debating whether or not he should ask for help for his ship. But before he can say anything, there's just Julian in the background trying to sneak off of the Falcon, but instead reaching the airlock and slamming his face first it and giving a sharp cry.)

Dammit, kid! How many times have I told you that you're banned and don't make so much racket, I don't want the Midnighter showing up because of it. (while Han turns to face the communicator and is about to ask for help before the face of the Midnighter being unimpressed is behind Vesper.)

He's right behind me, isn't he?
carbonite: (SMARTASS)
[personal profile] carbonite
[ It hadn’t taken much for Han to snag Bruce into helping move. For one: he doesn’t have much to do with X-Club being awk and Jen disappearing again. For two: Han fricking Solo.

So here he is, holding up one end of a chair as they move through the carrier. The vid feed is kind of angled weird from where Han had dropped his onto the darn thing, and - Bruce actually looks like he’s handling it well? And isn’t dying?? Nerdy boy got some beef going on.

So, this is. You weren’t kidding about the space bit, huh.

Shifty, you don’t get it -

[This would be Han Solo practically jumping up and down at the scene of the Millennium Falcon, resting in all her glory in the hangar of the Carrier. Well, its just the hull and the interior is empty, but what does Han care? ]

There she is, the fastest ship in the galaxy. There- my baby- do you see it?

[In case anyone didn’t know that Han had other faces apart from severe judgment. There’s a giant smile on that face.]

Wh- The Falcon is--

[ Bruce cranes his neck around to try and see what has Han going gaga - but as he’s the one going backwards, that’s a bit difficult to do. ]


[ Well, that doesn’t take long. Han drops the chair on him as he goes to race on board like a small child, with absolutely no care that the current shlepping is a definite two person job and without somebody else holding up his end, guess what you get, Network? You get a primo view of Bruce stooping and trying to balance a chair on his own before going and getting pinned under it. Because Han is a douche like that. ]



Jul. 12th, 2012 01:04 pm
[personal profile] carbonite
I leave you guys alone for one moment and everything just falls apart. You all better be okay for the most part, I'd hate to come down there and wring your neck if you got yourself critically hurt.

(huff puff, he sounds like he has a lot of yelling to do but it's mostly because he wasn't there and he doesn't really have the right to yell at people.)

Whatever, I have a bunch of stuff to give away that I don't really want. There's the poncho that smells like smoke and Ewok when I was almost cooked by stuffed aliens and some of Leia's clothes that she left behind including that disguise she wore to get me out of Jabbas and that thing. You can understand why I don't want to be reminded of that.

Before you all throw a fit over her stuff, if she ever shows up here again, I'll just get her new clothes.


Jun. 28th, 2012 01:07 pm
[personal profile] carbonite
Since I'm getting off of this damn planet and actually going back into space, I'm subletting my apartment.

It's a great place, really quiet and private and the neighbors are way too pretentious or are usually out all night to care what you do. Have fun with it or whatever, no need to tell me what you're going to do with it though. Really, the less I know the less liable I am for anything that happens there. This month's rent is paid, so you actually get a free month in a great apartment. (this, sadly is said terribly sarcastically.)

If you're interested, contact Han Solo for the specifics.
carbonite: (LOOK AT YOUR CHOICES!!)
[personal profile] carbonite
(it doesn't matter what han and james were doing before han grabbed is communicator to shakily to show what had just happened. james bond is frozen in some position (seriously don't ask what they were doing).)

Something happened, I don't know what happened, I think James … broke. He's all -

(he doesn't say the "f" word but really james is still in one place and han is actually freaking out about what he did.)

I have a bad feeling about this. A really, really, really, bad feeling about this. Send all your hocus pocus types because I think this is more in the realm of the Force and Darth Vader than - than I don't know. Just someone come over and fix him.

(just like that, as if nothing happened james just reanimates, causing han to pull his blaster out at him - sorry dude, habit.)

I didn't think you'd disagree with the superiority of actually driving your car rather than automatic gear shifts.


May. 12th, 2012 12:39 pm
[personal profile] carbonite
Do y'know what would be great? That while Leia and I are trying to take out a shield generator on Endor that we wouldn't:

a.) be attacked by Imperials
b.) be almost cooked by Ewoks
c.) get ported back to this damn planet!

I mean, it's not as if we were trying to turn the tides on a galactic civil war or anything. But sure, General Solo can grace you all with his presence.

So, hi. How are all of you? I'm doing great.


Mar. 15th, 2012 05:42 pm
carbonite: (SMARTASS)
[personal profile] carbonite
I like to think of myself as a tolerant sort of guy. I've been to a bunch of systems, been shot at by the local mercenaries, maybe "solved some logistics problems", maybe had some Imperial Stormtroopers shoot at me- you know, soaking up the local culture and all that.

So, imagine my surprise when I learned that you could get arrested for trying to get from one place to another. Oh no, you're going over a speed limit and you're going "to hurt someone". Seriously, listen I know I throw around the word "backwater" more than I should, but I doubt that they have speed limits on Coruscant because who wants to stop Imperials from getting from one place to the other quickly. Actually, scratch that analogy, that's actually what the majority of the galaxy wants.

Point being, I'm sort of glad that the Millennium Falcon isn't here. I don't know what the "police" would do to stop her from being only the best ship in the galaxy. Now, I could turn this into something positive and tell you how she managed to out maneuver the Empire in an asteroid field (thanks to her amazing pilot too, but this isn't about me), but I don't want to make anyone feel bad about their inferior ships.
[identity profile] soloisms.livejournal.com
[nothing is more awesome than being blind and teleported away from the people trying to save you from being executed.]

suefhoasfd;safd;;;;;;9uq-ef94-fopsdc sdfnokmlssaksdf - [whoops, sent.]


Nov. 5th, 2011 01:11 pm
[identity profile] soloisms.livejournal.com
[Han's working on a car- a different car- this car to be exact. Han's just upset that everything he owns has to have "character" and not work. Who he's ranting to? It's not shown, but all there's a shot of is this little guy.]

Why, why is it that when I get a new anything, something has to go wrong. Where's that manual? This is such a bucket of bolts, what am I supposed to do with this? [But, Han sounds more happy working on this old school Charger than when talking about his Bugatti.]

Find me a place that sells parts, won't you? [yep, get to it.]
[identity profile] soloisms.livejournal.com
Three things:

One: Is a, uh - [he has to go outside to show some of his winnings.] considered a "good" car?

Two: how is making the guy giving you your driver's license throw up a valid reason to deny me a license. Thankfully, I'm a really persuasive sort of guy and now I'm "allowed" to hit the streets.

Three: I went into a studio for a job as a mechanic, and it turned out that it was a show about cars? But the guy needed someone to bounce their lines off of then suddenly they offered me his job? You're gonna have to explain to me what this is all about, I don't really get it. The pay is good--too good--but it'll help pay for a new place for Leia and I and I can do this whole pilot's license thing.

So, there you have it.

filtered to mara; )

filtered to leia; )

filtered to zatanna; )

[ooc; ooc sign ups for Top Gear: City. We still need two more hosts and two more producers and you can pretty much make up your own position.]


Sep. 8th, 2011 04:41 pm
[identity profile] soloisms.livejournal.com
just in case anyone cared, her royal highness princess leia has been ported out of here and is probably going to go get in trouble with jabba the hutt.

you know, just in case you were wondering.
[identity profile] soloisms.livejournal.com
Now, I've seen a lot of strange stuff and I do mean strange and I rarely give out advice. But hey, here we go: watch out for a greasy haired guy with a weird stick that shoots out this weird light. Who knew that they made wooden sticks that were almost as spooky as this whole "Force" thing that Luke's into. [a shrug that is a shrug of judgement.] Not that I'm judging, but look just look out for them.

If you run into them and they do something funny - [like he'll say what happened ...] go find Zatanna Zatara, she'll help you out of the hot water.

cut from leia. )


Jul. 14th, 2011 06:37 pm
[identity profile] soloisms.livejournal.com
[well, someone is in a good mood or it's probably his ego.]

 I'm pretty famous here, huh? Anyway, maybe my celebrity status can help me out a bit. Considering the fact that I was pulled while I was trying to rescue the Princess and --- well, I'm pretty sure you know where this is going. I need an extra source of income and now that I don't have to give any of it to Jabba, I think I might like it. I heard that someone called the former profession "logistics", but now I'm more or less an icon, right?

If you've got anything good, contact me. I got one of those old-age communicators. How you all get anything done is beyond me.

Speaking of not getting anything done, I'm no good sitting around and doing nothing. I'm going to go do something, whether or not you want to come is up to you. Here's hoping I get myself the equivalent of the Millennium Falcon in a card game - what would that be here? It'll be hard to match that beautiful ship, real hard.

[ooc; now with more open logs.]


Jun. 23rd, 2011 12:49 am
[identity profile] soloisms.livejournal.com
Oh, would you look at this hunk of junk. Do you know how long it took me to be able to use this thing? Too long, that's what. Look, I hope I'm not going to have to deal with some ancient civilization here because chances are either you'll get this message and you'll want to shoot me or you'll get this message and you won't have any idea what I'm saying. [look, he's being positive! progress is sweet…]

But, what do I have to lose? I've already lost the ship, the Wookie, the droids and a Princess -which, ironically is exactly what I'm sort of looking for. But, the funny thing is that this place doesn't even look like it could hold any of it and I haven't even heard word about them with the reports on these hunks of junks -- I said that already, right? -- you call monitors.

So, here's what I am thinking. We got eaten while we were on that asteroid or Jabba has gotten really creative and he's trying to get his money's worth through laughs . I am banking more on the first rather than the latter, only because Jabba pays people to have an imagination for him and they don't have any either. If this was the Empire, I would have already been shot.

Someone care to help me out? Where am I? [also if you happened to have seen a rather large Wookie, please contact Han Solo.] I have a bad feeling about this...


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