Vol. 2, Issue 11 [News Flash]

[killerjoke.livejournal.com]

[Obligatory shot of a male anchor behind a news desk, behind him is a video of people rushing out of a mall.]

An explosion in a mall today in Texas has been linked to the criminal known as the Joker. Reports on an exact number of casualties has yet to be released, but the death toll is estimated at at least 50. Along with the explosion, a deadly gas known as "Joker Toxin" or "Joker Venom" was released, causing victims' skin to turn white, their hair become green, and their faces frozen in a grin.

It's unclear how the Joker managed to pull off the attack, as he's currently in custody here in the city. Authorities are looking into and already there's talk of Texas demanding the Joker be tried there so he can face the death penalty. More as the news unfolds.

Up next; it could kill you instantly and you're probably using it right now. More after this commercial break.

[The display cuts off to reveal the Joker grinning in his cell.]

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. Oh, that was a good one. Time delayed explosives that go off if you don't enter a code every several days are SO essential in this line of work.

Comments

[nyc-detective.livejournal.com]

How did you get your hands on them.

[killerjoke.livejournal.com]

You don't think I stayed in town this whoooooole time, did you?

[nyc-detective.livejournal.com]

[Elisa closes the connection, she's got Investigating to do]

private, text

[jonocalypse.livejournal.com]

I know you're the one handling this case, official-like, but is there anything I can do to help?

private, text | dfakjshdf I'm so sorry I didn't see this earlier

[nyc-detective.livejournal.com]

Yeah. I need to know how his goons are a) still running loose, b) got their hands on this crap, and c) got away with it. Can you look into that for me?

private, text | tis alright ;)

[jonocalypse.livejournal.com]

On it, luv.

private, text |

[nyc-detective.livejournal.com]

Great. Tell me what you dig up, if anything.

[notthebatman.livejournal.com]

You know, I'm half tempted to campaign for handing you to the Texans and watching you fry.

[killerjoke.livejournal.com]

But you won't.

[notthebatman.livejournal.com]

Try me. What makes you think I won't do that? You've killed God knows how many innocent people. Electrocuting you would be doing the world a favor.

[killerjoke.livejournal.com]

Hahahaha. I almost believed that, Harv. I really did.

[notthebatman.livejournal.com]

What makes you think I'm lying?

[killerjoke.livejournal.com]

Because you don't got it in ya to kill a fellow, even 3 steps removed as this would be.

[notthebatman.livejournal.com]

...

Shit.

[killerjoke.livejournal.com]

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

[notthebatman.livejournal.com]

Shut up!

[killerjoke.livejournal.com]

Make me. Or maybe next time it will be one of your wards that they're takin' out of the mall in body bags. Maybe a lady friend of yours thinks it'd be a nice idea and stop by Starbucks on her way to work, only... UH OH! Special Joker blend today! At least she'd die happy.

[notthebatman.livejournal.com]

That won't work.

[killerjoke.livejournal.com]

I know. That's the hilarious part. Not even something like that could get you to do it.

[notthebatman.livejournal.com]

We'll see about that.

[aaaand the comm clicks off. Jerk.]

[questioness.livejournal.com]

Stop letting him bother you, dammit.

[notthebatman.livejournal.com]

...Montoya? What are you doing here?

[questioness.livejournal.com]

... Forget I said anything. Just don't end up getting yourself killed.

[notthebatman.livejournal.com]

No wait, why are you here? When did you show up?

...this is one of those 'future me's crazy' things, isn't it? Are you still working with Gordon?

[theprimerprime.livejournal.com]

More than half.

[killerjoke.livejournal.com]

Ooooh, someone else that thinks they got it in them to be a killer.

[theprimerprime.livejournal.com]

I do what needs to be done.

[killerjoke.livejournal.com]

Riiiight. Sure you do.

[theprimerprime.livejournal.com]

Hey. I get the go-ahead to take care of you myself, and you won't have to worry about any trip to Texas.

[killerjoke.livejournal.com]

Oh, I can hardly wait.

[theprimerprime.livejournal.com]

Neither can I.

[darkhours.livejournal.com]

I am beginning to see the pattern to your punchlines.

[killerjoke.livejournal.com]

Oh?

[darkhours.livejournal.com]

They're not funny.

But also, they're offensive.

[killerjoke.livejournal.com]

I ain't tryin' to be Bill Cosby here.

[darkhours.livejournal.com]

At least he can make people laugh without pushing someone down stairs.

[killerjoke.livejournal.com]

It would be hilarious if he did though!

[darkhours.livejournal.com]

No it wouldn't.

[killerjoke.livejournal.com]

Sure it would! Because it's so unexpected.

Voice;

[wantbetterworld.livejournal.com]

So you're the ponce who's buggering up this city the most.

Re: Voice;

[killerjoke.livejournal.com]

Flatterer. If you're lucky, I miiiiiiight be getting conjugal visits soon...

Voice;

[wantbetterworld.livejournal.com]

[T'is indeed a pity when one realizes that grimaces don't show up using voice.] Disgusting.

Why the hell does a fucking twit like you still have their comm. device?

Re: Voice;

[killerjoke.livejournal.com]

Well that would just be mean to take it away.

Voice; Until Further notice

[wantbetterworld.livejournal.com]

Cripes...

What kind of fucking twit brags about this sort of shit? Just like sodding Gamorra, I swear.

Re: Voice;

[killerjoke.livejournal.com]

Sodding Gamorra. Hehe, that's funny.