one █ voice

[uzi]

_{( The voice is clipped, sharp, and to the point-- no scuffling with controls or stopping to take things in, here. Also? Whoever this woman is, she sounds pissed off. )}

So, City—great name, by the way, though I think someone beat you to it—stop me if I’ve got any of this wrong.

Alternate dimension, time travel, and duplicates of people we might already know. Superpowers, overly ambitious AI, and absolutely no discretion about who it pulls in, despite claiming to want “heroes.”

And apparently no reliable way back, since you’re all sitting on your hands, here. Perfect.

Just one question—is the universe as I know it going to implode because of all this crap?

Comments

[uzi]

You're going to have to cut down on the rambling.

And if it really is random-but-not, then it's more about whoever programmed the machine and not the thing itself.

[webline]

Sorry.

I don't think anyone knows who programmed her though. If they did, they found out before I got here and no one's sharing.

[uzi]

Perfect.

So what have you been doing, then? Exploring the big, wide, alternate world?

[webline]

Um. Going to school? And -- interning for Tony Stark.

[uzi]

Well, he certainly got over that brain tumor quickly. _{( that's a joke. mostly. )}

[webline]

[ AWKWARD PAUSE OMG.... ]

He's different.

[uzi]

That seems to be the world of the day.

Is he still a rich asshole with a super suit and a sex addiction?

[webline]

Uh. [ she doesnt know about hit sex life ok nor does she want to ]

I don't know about how much of a jerk he is but... I mean, those things are the same, but he's just. He's different.

[uzi]

Well then your homework is to to make a list of those differences so we can keep track of them. _{( also kind of a joke. maybe. )}

[webline]

I'm getting homework already?

[ ISN'T JOKING CRY ]

[uzi]

Get used to it. If I'm working triple-duty to make up for our lack of personnel, you get to, too.

[webline]

Okay, but I'm adding it to my volunteer services for when I start college applications.

[ thats a joke ]

[uzi]

I'm sure we can find you a scholarship for teenage special agents.

[webline]

Working for SHIELD as a junior agent should be enough to get me into any college, really.

[ she wishes ]

[uzi]

Sure. If you live that long.

[webline]

[ a pause. ouch. :c ]

That's reassuring.

[uzi]

Hey, you go to school. You get enough people spoon-feeding you reassurances.

[webline]

Well, if the current spider record for our world says anything....

[ BITTER NOISE

SOMEONE'S NOT OVER IT ]

[uzi]

So, prove the record wrong.

[webline]

[ a pause ]

Don't really have a choice.

[uzi]

_{( she nods. )}

No, you don't. But if you're worth anything much you'll take that as a challenge and live to be a hundred.

[webline]

I -- [ cutting herself off. ]

-- Uh, thanks. [ was all determined for a moment and now she's just feeling awkward again... ]

[uzi]

Don't thank me. Really.

[webline]

I take it back then?

[ oh god kill her ]

[uzi]

Tell me: do you have to try to be this awkward, or does it just come naturally?