voice;

[amoray]

So what are you gonna do when they outlaw all that superheroin' nonsense you all lowe so damn much?

[to his credit, he's trying to sound grave. (it isn't working.)]

We take this - and we're goin' to, since we got such big pushers for mustard-bellied diplomacy in charge around here - they ain't gonna be satisfied 'til they got us all on leashes. And at the first signs a dissent, they're gonna hang us by 'em. I sure hope you lot can handle the usage a our powers bein' a criminal offense, since that's the next thing to go. A Wulcanus gun in ewery Natiwe hand and a trackin' chip in ewery filthy imPort, right?

[a theatrical pause. contrary to his usual habit of getting worked up in his tirades, eridan's been very calm (albeit smug in his "my unreasonable paranoia was entirely justified" kind of way) but no less intense throughout.]

We start goin quietly into that good fuckin' nocturnal phase and we aint newer gonna stop.

Comments

voice;

[amoray]

Do tell.

voice;

[doubleoohbaby]

A former guardian of yours. Think you could fill him full of holes if I paid you enough?

voice;

[amoray]

It'd hawe to be a whole hell of a lot to hawe me riskin' Felicia handin' my ass to me.

[THAT'S RIGHT KEEP THAT STRAIGHT UP DON'T GIVE A FUCK BRAVADO GOING]

voice;

[doubleoohbaby]

That sounds like an excuse to me.

voice;

[amoray]

I didn't say I wouldn't.

I just said I'd need a fuckin' shipload a cash to do it.

voice;

[doubleoohbaby]

Mm, he's not worth that much. Sounds more like you're afraid.

voice;

[amoray]

Or that I'm tryin' to put my reasonable fortune from Alternia back together.

Take your pick.

voice;

[doubleoohbaby]

I think I was more accurate.

voice;

[amoray]

And I think you're either full a shit or just fuckin' stupid.

Fact a the matter bein' that I could kill anybody if I had good enough incentiwe to. And killin' Ed would be like stompin' a wiggler.

voice;

[doubleoohbaby]

You still have feelings for him, don't you?

voice;

[amoray]

Feelins of... platonic hatred?

[UGH]

voice;

[doubleoohbaby]

Feelings of kinship.

voice;

[amoray]

We got similarities. Parallels and what fuckin' not.

Doesn't necessarily mean anythin'.

voice;

[doubleoohbaby]

But you wouldn't kill him.

voice;

[amoray]

Beliewe me, there's nothin' that would make me feel better than slittin' Ed Nygma from gullet to groin.

[a beat.]

It'd just be a really obwious course a action is all. The jealous ex comin' back and blowin' the back outta Nygma's skull, to the emotional outrage and torment a absolutely nobody - that's romcom shit.

No class in it whatsoewer.

voice;

[doubleoohbaby]

What'd you pay me to do it?

voice; 1/2

[amoray]

How about jack fuckin' shit.

I'm not payin' somebody else to just kill him, that takes all the meanin' out of it happenin'. Mostly on account a he'd just fuckin' come back and probably blame me for it all goin' down anyway. Which wouldn't be wrong, but still.

No, that ain't how you go about this kinda thing, Bond. You gotta rot 'em from the inside out. Hit 'em in the soft parts, if you get my drift.

Re: voice;

[amoray]

...I mean attackin' what they care about.

[phrasing.]

voice;

[doubleoohbaby]

Oh, I was thinking more of a hit to the bollocks.

voice;

[amoray]

I might pay you to do that.

voice;

[doubleoohbaby]

I'll do it for $100.

voice;

[amoray]

I was jokin', fuck. Don't know what kinda spiteful psycho you take me for.

[LOCKED.]

Deal.

voice;

[doubleoohbaby]

My mistake. I just thought you'd appreciate it.

[Locked]

Perfect. You might have to take my word for it.

voice; locked

[amoray]

If I don't hear him whinin' about gettin' kicked in the shame globes at some point or other, I'm goin' to be one unhappy as fuck customer.

voice; locked

[doubleoohbaby]

You can pay me after the deed is done. How's that for good business companionship?

[Because even if he doesn't get paid, he still got to hit Eddie in the nuts.]