001 && [ACCIDENTAL VOICE POST; JAPANESE, TRANSLATED SOMEHOW (SUBTITLED?)]

[amnotaweasel.livejournal.com]

[sudden staticky exhalation]

Wait a minute, what do you mean "hero"? You can't just go around dragging people away from where they're supposed to be and making them police your city!

[a reply, male, too muffled to make out specific words]

This just… it shouldn't be allowed! Send me back, send me back right now! And don't you look down at me like that! …yes, I know you're six feet tall and I'm not--

Huh? This thing? It's on? What's it even do, anyway? Hey! Owch! Stupid thing!

Comments

[voice: Japanese//translated]

[amnotaweasel.livejournal.com]

Huh...? Are you trying not to make any sense?

This little box can't really do that, can it?

[grenadeball.livejournal.com]

are you saying you want to test it

[voice: Japanese//translated]

[amnotaweasel.livejournal.com]

No! No not at all! Bad enough that Aoshi-sama already sold my clan's honor, I don't want him off selling his body!!

It can't really make him do that, can it...?

[grenadeball.livejournal.com]

nah

though it would make it amazingly easy for him to transmit naked images of himself to the world, whether on purpose or accidentally, if he had one

[voice: Japanese//translated]

[amnotaweasel.livejournal.com]

Uhhh... Uhhh... Uhhhhh.... [then faintly traumatized laughter]

[grenadeball.livejournal.com]

there's your welcome

s'up, buttercup

what's your name

[voice: Japanese//translated]

[amnotaweasel.livejournal.com]

My name is Makimachi Misao. Who are you?

[grenadeball.livejournal.com]

tank girl

and yeah, it's my real name

[voice: Japanese//translated]

[amnotaweasel.livejournal.com]

Nice to meet you, Tank Girl. You into this hero thing, too?

[Voice]

[grenadeball.livejournal.com]

[Click.]

HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha.


HahahahahahahhahahahahahaHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.

No.

[voice: Japanese//translated]

[amnotaweasel.livejournal.com]

So what made that so funny?

[Voice]

[grenadeball.livejournal.com]

Everything, Jesus, Mary and Joseph. I ain't do the goddamn hero thing one minute of any day.

[voice: Japanese//translated]

[amnotaweasel.livejournal.com]

So are you the other thing then? A villain? Or are you just you?

[Voice]

[grenadeball.livejournal.com]

I kick back, drink all day, build shit, and hit on pretty men and women.

So, the second option.

Villain thing is retarded bullshit, really. It's all a bunch of people going - GURK A DURF, I'MMA PUT ON TIGHT STUFF THAT SHOWS OFF MY IMPOSSIBLY SMALL JUNK, WEAR MY REN FAIRE CAPE, BUILD A VOLCANO BOMB, AND THEN MONOLOGUE ABOUT MY AMAZING PLAN/TRAGIC PAST/HOW PATHETIC THE HEROES ARE/THAT ONE HOGAN'S HEROES EPISODE, and then they get punched in the throat. Only to do it again, two weeks later.

[voice: Japanese//translated]

[amnotaweasel.livejournal.com]

Wow. Now that I look it like that, they sound really pathetic!

...wait... you say your name is "Tank Girl," which means you're probably a girl, but you "hit on" pretty women, too? Am I just not understanding "hit on"?



_________
OOC: I'm sorry, she's from Meiji-era Kyoto. Bisexuals and lesbian sex don't exist yet in her brain.

[Voice]

[grenadeball.livejournal.com]

Hahahahaha, waitasec. When are you from?

[voice: Japanese//translated]

[amnotaweasel.livejournal.com]

I'm from 1879.

Is what I think you were talking about even possible?

[Voice]

[grenadeball.livejournal.com]

Oh, man, honey, welcome to 2009, and a lot has changed besides technology. I mean, you had the gay samurais - or what was left of gay samurais, I guess - but not so much on the lady side, s'pose.

[voice: Japanese//translated]

[amnotaweasel.livejournal.com]

So, wait. There are women who sleep with other women? But what about men? Don't they get mad about being left out? Probably serves them right thanks to the Mary Ruth Case (http://www.onemanga.com/Rurouni_Kenshin/148/06/), but...

[grenadeball.livejournal.com]

Pffft, the men beat off thinking about two women going at it, nowadays.

'Course, women also do five finger poker thinking about two men getting mad rutty nowadays, too.

[amnotaweasel.livejournal.com]

Huh?

[grenadeball.livejournal.com]

Y'heard me. Check it out, there's whole businesses and genres dedicated to this stuff.

(Yeah, she's going to end up SO traumatized.)

[amnotaweasel.livejournal.com]

I... I see...

I guess I kind of have to check it out, now...

[grenadeball.livejournal.com]

Don't dip too far, as I'm pretty sure that, hearing your voice tremble around at about 'curious but not the kind of curious that goes into romance novel lead ins', you're not like me, and you could find some shit that'd just rip your head apart.

Stick to the vanilla (HA, well, vanilla as you can manage, I suppose), and just punch in...

Shit, what's the Japanese words for this stuff? Ah, fuck it. Punch in 'gay' and 'lesbian'. And stick to the regular stuff. Once you jumped in, don't just keep going.

[amnotaweasel.livejournal.com]

Don't worry, I'm not going to let my head get ripped apart by what other people do. I'm sure I've seen much worse than anything anybody could come up with if it's supposed to be pleasant.