voice;

[amoray]

[he doesn't start speaking right as the feed starts! there's a solid second or two of eridan trying to find his train of thought, the occasional heavy, expectant breath or two the only signs of his false starts.]

Well, Mexico was a shipload a fun. Don't know about anybody else's impromptu as fuck abscondin'.

Not my point of makin' this point though, so listen up, landlubbers.

[there is a decided lack of flair in eridan's voice, despite the (sharp, direct) pun/nautical reference or two. he's purposeful.]

They say they're cuttin' me loose soon, probably on account a my bein' such a charminly well-behawed prisoner and all. Due to personal circumstances, I'll be needin' to get a few affairs in order before my date a release.

I need a place to liwe, a tutor for the upcomin' schoolfeedin' year, and hopefully enough, some manner a profession. If you're willin' to hire a sewen solar sweep year old like myself, a course, don't want to go about misleadin' folk. Lyin' to 'em. Suchlike.

[a stale beat.]

No nosy hiwemates. Roommates, whatewer. I don't fuckin' like most a you and I probably won't giwe a shit about your problems, so keep your cartilage nubs outta mine. I got more than enough beetles in my coffers to keep me afloat for a while, so rent ain't gonna be an issue. Probably.

[a beat. he sounds like he means to say something dramatic or heartfelt to top off his posts like usual, and then:]

Preferably cat friendly. But I'm flexible.

Comments

[amoray]

wwoah those are some mighty fuckin sevvere accusations to be makin kar particularly wwhen they ARENT TRUE NOT WWHATSOEVVER
i dont hit on you youre the one alwways gettin all fuckin hateful wwith me eff wwhy aye

im sobbing ehlp

[crab]

I CAN HATE YOU AND NOT WANT TO PUT MY MOUTH ON YOUR GROSS FISHY AIR HOLE.
PLATONIC HATE! WOW! WHAT A CONCEPT!
TAKE A FEW MOMENTS TO ALLOW THAT TO SINK IN.
IF YOU'RE NOT HITTING ON ME WHY DO YOU BRING IT UP AT EVERY OPPORTUNITY?
ARE YOU HOPING MY ANSWER WILL SPONTANEOUSLY CHANGE AND BECOME YES, ERIDAN, I AM IN THE BLACK THROES FOR YOU, DEEPER OBSIDIAN HAS NEVER TOUCHED MY PUSHER IN ALL OF MY SWEEPS, I AM CONSUMED WITH BURNING KISMESAL DESIRE AND CAN NO LONGER CONTAIN IT.

LMFAO THIS ENTIRE COMPOUND TRAINWRECK THREAD

[amoray]

ok you get really awwkwwardly intense about it though

CAN THEY BOTH STOP WITH THE UNINTENTIONAL FLIRTING

[crab]

I GET AWKWARDLY INTENSE ABOUT EVERYTHING ERIDAN.

IT'S RIDICULOUS OMG

[amoray]

yeah ok you havve a point there

THYERE SO DUMB AND SUGGESTIVE IM CRY

[crab]

THANK YOU, GOD.
NOW KINDLY REMOVE YOUR UGLY FROND FROM MY BLACK QUADRANT, I DON'T WANT YOU IN IT, NOR WILL I EVER WANT YOU IN IT.

[amoray]

good id hardly tolerate spoilin my quadrants wwith a gutterblood anywway dont get all fuckin excited like gam apparently is dowwn there or all the time or wwhatevver

[crab]

UGH CAN WE NOT BRING HIS APPARENT "HABIT" INTO THIS IT'S GOING TO MAKE EVERYTHING EVEN WEIRDER THAN IT ALREADY WAS.
WHAT IF HE'S IMAGINED US GETTING IT OFF.

[amoray]

oh you knoww he has
wwell less me since wwe broke up and more just entirely you im probably gettin saddled wwith images a gruesome torture and suchlike

wwhich isnt that bad in comparison

[crab]

I MEANT
YOU KNOW WHAT YOU DON'T WANT TO KNOW WHAT I MEANT.
I DON'T WANT TO EXPLAIN WHAT I MEANT.
WE CAN PREEMPTIVELY STRIKE WHAT I MEANT FROM THE RECORD.
AND SHUT THE FUCK UP OUR QUADRANT IS CONCILIATORY.
YOURS WAS CONCUPISCENT.
YOU'RE MUCH MORE LIKELY TO GET THE IMAGINARY PAIL TREATMENT.

[amoray]

yeah but he hates me noww in a wwholy platonic kinda manner i doubt hes imaginin shit except my brutal murder
and i knoww wwhat you meant stupid hes probably imaginin us locked in a caliginous embrace or somethin

[crab]

AND OUR AFFECTION IS STRICTLY NON PHYSICAL!
UUUUUUUUUGH DON'T EVEN
FUCK
FUCK THIS ENTIRE CONVERSATION.
FUCK GAMZEE.
FUCK HIS IMAGINATION.
AND MOST ESPECIALLY FUCK YOU.
I'M GOING TO BE SICK.

[amoray]

god thats great i wwish he wwould of revvealed his secretly bein a vvoyeurous kinda imaginin sort earlier

[crab]

WHY WOULD YOU WANT THAT
WHY WOULD ANYONE WANT THAT
THIS WAS ONE OF LIFE'S UNANSWERED QUESTIONS THAT SHOULD HAVE REMAINED UNANSWERED.
A QUESTION NO ONE SHOULD EVER HAVE ASKED.
I NEVER WANTED THIS KNOWLEDGE IMPARTED UPON ME AND NOW IT HAS I WILL NEVER BE ABLE TO PART WITH IT.
I'LL ALWAYS FUCKING KNOW NOW.
ETERNITY YAWNS BEFORE ME AS AN UNWELCOMING, UNKIND VACUUM WHERE THE SORDID UNDERBELLY OF GAMZEE MAKARA'S IMAGINATION HAS BEEN ILLUMINATED FOR MY TORMENTED OPTICS TO BEHOLD.
I DIDN'T WANT THIS.

[amoray]

because a its hilarious twwo it showws howw goddamn wweird he is and tres it makes you fuckin lose your shit

[crab]

YOU ARE SO DISGUSTING I MIGHT JUST HORF UP EVERY LAST ONE OF MY ORGANS AND BECOME A HUSK, FILLED POWERED AND PROPELLED BY RAGE SO PURE AND TERRIBLE I WILL BE KNOWN IN SWEEPS TO COME ONLY AS A HEINOUS LEGENDARY ABOMINATION OF UNSTOPPABLE HATE, THE LIKES OF WHICH HAS NEVER BEEN NOR WILL EVER BE SEEN AGAIN.