voice;

[amoray]

So.

Any a you ewer had a nemesis before? Like fated fuckin' contentiousness, always gettin' up each others' gills doin' shit just to irritate 'em, duelin' to practically the death, maybe makin' out a little, that kinda thing.

See, I'm in the market for just that particular arrangement, and while I'm personally a master of the bellicose arts and don't need any adwice or nothin', I obwiously got a wested interest in how humans go about poorly imitatin' the quadrant. What with my bein' the main troll-human confidante in these parts and such.

[he pronounces it "con-fee-dawn-tay". also he means intermediary.]

Despite most of you bein' from a society bearin' a sewerely inferior romance system and therefore gettin' your emotions all scrambled up wrong from the get-go 'cos of it, I'd appreciate hearin' some personal tales.

Comments

[audio]

[fuckheads]

I do.

[ He sounds like he's getting angry just remembering. ]

Wouldn't exactly call her my nemesis though. Well, she's fucking blighted my life enough to deserve the title, I guess.

[audio]

[amoray]

[OHOHO SOMEBODY WITH ACTUAL BLACK FEELINS he is chinhandsing]

What, she kick your fuckin' woofbeast or somethin'? What'd she do?

[audio]

[fuckheads]

Let's see.

She scammed me out of a ton of money, keeps trying to get me killed, changes the rules of whatever weird game she's playing at the moment whenever she gets bored, confiscates my shit whenever it amuses her, and may or may not have hired upwards of ten dudes to try and kill me, I'm still not actually fucking clear on that point, and then of course she arbitrarily changes her mind on shit constantly.

[audio]

[amoray]

...Goddamn.

[beat.]

Sounds kinda like an ex a mine, actually. Probably whole separate people, but I figured one was enough for fuckin' paradox space.

Re: [audio]

[fuckheads]

Really? What all did your ex do?

[audio]

[amoray]

You know, murdered a fuck load of people our age, got up my gills about ewery fuckin' thing, psychotic, kinda a bitch - you know the type, I'm guessin'.

[audio]

[fuckheads]

Yeah I've known a few of those.

Way more than I probably should, actually.

[audio]

[amoray]

I got a couple after my ass around here, honestly.

You really gotta watch for the psychos. You sass 'em once, they get all kinds a attached, pretty soon their sendin' you bouquets of sewered ears, it's a fuckin' mess.

[audio]

[fuckheads]

Well luckily none of my psychos really got the chance to be repeat offenders.

[audio]

[amoray]

Just wait. Sooner or later you're gonna get one here all tryin' to mail people your ears and shit.

[audio]

[fuckheads]

Well I can always put the bouquet of ears in a nice pot and plant it in my garden of shit being fucked up.