♋ thirteenth.

[crab]

[private | kanaya maryam | text]
HEY.
OK THIS IS
I’M NOT REALLY SURE WHERE TO START, BUT I
I’M SORRY FOR IGNORING YOU, I JUST DIDN’T KNOW WHAT TO SAY.
I’M STILL NOT SURE WHAT TO SAY, TO BE PERFECTLY HONEST WITH YOU.
BUT MY SILENCE WASN’T A REFLECTION ON YOU OR MY SENTIMENTS TOWARDS YOU OR ANYTHING, I PROMISE.
I WAS SHUTTING OUT EVERYONE. EVEN GAMZEE.
I’M JUST
NOT SURE WHAT I’M SUPPOSED TO DO OR WHERE I’M SUPPOSED TO GO FROM WHERE I AM RIGHT NOW.
OK I’M TALKING IN CIRCLES RIGHT NOW, I ACKNOWLEDGE THAT.
I JUST DON’T WANT THINGS BETWEEN US TO CHANGE, KANAYA.
AND I THINK IN PART THE REASON WHY I HAVEN’T CONTACTED YOU SOONER IS THAT I’M AFRAID THAT, AFTER EVERYTHING THAT’S HAPPENED, IT’S INEVITABLE THAT THEY WILL.
THAT THEY PROBABLY ALREADY HAVE.
AND I CAN’T PREDICT IF AND HOW WE’RE GOING TO BE ABLE TO ADJUST.
THERE IS ONE THING I CAN SAY WITH CERTAINTY ISN’T GOING TO CHANGE THOUGH
I LOVE YOU TOO.

[private | nepeta leijon | text]
THERE IS ABSOLUTELY NO EXCUSE FOR THE WAY I’VE TREATED YOU
I DON’T EXPECT YOU TO FORGIVE ME, OR EVEN RESPOND TO THIS MESSAGE
AND I’LL SPARE YOU THE OVERWROUGHT SELF FLAGELLATION
I JUST WANTED TO SAY
EVEN THOUGH IT IS ESSENTIALLY WORTHLESS IN THE FACE OF MY GARGANTUAN, THROBBING ASSHOLE ATTRIBUTE
I’M SORRY.
I’M SO, SO SORRY.
YOU DON’T DESERVE ANY OF THE SHIT I’VE PUT YOU THROUGH.

[private | feferi peixes | text]
I OWE YOU AN APOLOGY.
MY OTHER SELF WAS AN INSUFFERABLE, UNREASONABLE BILGEPOT WITH HIS HEAD SO FAR UP HIS HINDQUARTERS HE WAS INCAPABLE OF EXCRETING ANYTHING BAR GALLONS UPON GALLONS OF SHIT FROM HIS DISGUSTING MAW.
EVIDENCED BY THE FACT THAT, AMONG OTHER THINGS, HE THOUGHT TELLING SOMEONE TO MURDER THEIR LUSUS WAS AN OK THING TO SAY
AND NOT THE BABBLING OF THE MOST ENORMOUS JERKWAD TO EVER GRACE THIS CITY’S POPULATION.

[private | eridan ampora | text]
I HAVE SAT HERE FOR THE BETTER PART OF TWENTY MINUTES ATTEMPTING TO FORMULATE AN APPROACH TO THIS GODAWFUL FUCKSPLOSION OF A FIASCO
AND I HAVE THOROUGHLY AND GLORIOUSLY FAILED.
I FAILED WITH SUCH FLARE AND SKILL THAT I AM EXPECTING OFFICIAL COMMENDATIONS FROM THE INTERNATIONAL PROFESSIONAL FAILURES ASSOCIATION AT ANY MOMENT NOW.
THERE IS NO METHOD OF APPROACHING THIS.
ALL I CAN THINK TO SAY
IS TO ASK YOU
WHAT THE ACTUAL CANKERBLASTING FUCK DO YOU HAVE TO SAY FOR YOURSELF???

[private | edward nygma | text]
THIS IS YOUR OFFICIAL NOTICE:
YOU AND I ARE THROUGH.
I WILL NOT BE SPYING FOR YOU ANY LONGER.
I WILL NOT BE ASSISTING YOU IN ANY CAPACITY ANY LONGER.
I WILL NOT BE HAVING ANYTHING TO DO WITH YOU ANY LONGER.
I’M *NOT* YOUR INVESTMENT.
AND JUST TO GIVE YOU A HEADS UP
I INTEND TO TELL ERIDAN EVERYTHING REGARDING OUR TIME WORKING TOGETHER.
I SURE HOPE I RANG FALSE, ALL THOSE TIMES I TOLD YOU YOUR PLANS WITH ME WOULD BLOW UP IN YOUR FACE!
DON’T SAY I DIDN’T WARN YOU.

Comments

[crab]

I REALLY CANNOT EVEN BEGIN TO EXPOUND UPON HOW LITTLE I CARE ABOUT ANY OF THAT.
THERE IS A VAST SHORTAGE OF SHITS TO BE FOUND THAT WOULD OTHERWISE HAVE BEEN GIVEN ABOUT THE NATURE OF OUR PREVIOUS SETUP, HOW ILL ADVISED THAT SETUP OBVIOUSLY WAS (I KNEW THAT ALREADY, SHITNUGGET) OR MY STATUS AS A LIABILITY AS OPPOSED TO AN ASSET.
I REALLY, TRULY, DO NOT CARE.
BECAUSE I THINK IT SHOULD BE OBVIOUS
THAT SHORT OF LITERALLY MUZZLING ME
THERE IS VERY LITTLE YOU CAN DO TO SHUT UP KARKAT VANTAS.

[enigmaestro]

This is the oddest invitation to muzzle that I've ever encountered.

Kidding, of course. Perhaps the third oddest.

But your protest is duly noted, Karkat. It means nothing, I'm simply noting it to humor you.

However.

If you cross me in the more obvious manner, you are solely responsible for what I incur as consequence. Got it?

[crab]

IT WASN'T AN INVITATION YOU PEDANTIC PIECE OF SHIT.
GOD, I CAN'T EVEN MAKE SOME INFLAMMATORY JOKES AT YOUR EXPENSE
YOU REALLY DO MAKE AN ART OF BEING ONE OF THE MOST AGGRAVATING PEOPLE I'VE EVER HAD THE MISFORTUNE TO HAVE TO EXCHANGE DIALOGUE WITH
WHICH IS AN ACHIEVEMENT, WHEN YOU LOOK AT THE PEOPLE I GENERALLY ASSOCIATE WITH.
I CAN'T EVEN EXPRESS THE GLORIOUS JOY I EXPERIENCE WHEN I CONTEMPLATE LIFE WITHOUT YOUR SMUG SMEAR OF SHIT MARRING THE OTHERWISE PRISTINE VENEER OF MY EXISTENCE.
WHAT EXACTLY ARE YOU GOING TO "INCUR"?
WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO BE WITHERING IN FEAR OF, HERE.
TELL ME WHY I SHOULDN'T CROSS YOU.
GOD, IT'S NOT EVEN PERSONAL! ME COMING CLEAN WITH ERIDAN PRACTICALLY HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH YOU.
I COULD HAVE DONE IT WITHOUT EVEN BOTHERING TO GIVE YOU ANY FOREWARNING WHATSOEVER.
FOR SOMEONE SO OBSESSED WITH THE TRUTH, YOU'RE BEING INCREDIBLY UNGRATEFUL WHEN ALL I INTENDED TO DO HERE WAS BE HONEST WITH YOU!

[enigmaestro]

You're making a few logical errors along the way of that rant, Vantas, but let's begin with the most grievous: since when is an obsession with truth limited to mere expression of truth?

[crab]

THIS SOUNDS LIKE ANOTHER ONE OF THOSE INSCRUTABLE CONVERSATIONAL PATHS I'M GOING TO REGRET LETTING YOU DRAG MY PROTESTING CARCASS DOWN
BUT I GUESS, IT IS WHEN YOU AREN'T A DISGUSTING HYPOCRITE.
OH WAIT.
THAT EXPLAINS EVERYTHING.

[enigmaestro]

Does it make you feel better, misdirecting conversation like so? Does it make you feel less responsible?

[crab]

[ no, it doesn't make him feel better at all.

truth be told, he's afraid of edward nygma, and trying far too hard to mask it in flippancy and barbs. ]

SHUT UP.
YOU'RE NOT EVEN MAKING SENSE NOW.

[enigmaestro]

Oh, that's not true. I don't need my power to know that isn't true -- you betray yourself.

You wouldn't still be conversing with me, otherwise.

[crab]

WHAT MAKES YOU THINK YOU CAN DO ANYTHING AT ALL TO ME?
I JUST TOOK DOWN A GIANT DRUG SPRAYING MEGALOSHARK LIKE, LESS THAN A WEEK AGO.
WHAT MAKES YOU THINK YOU'RE A THREAT WORTH EVEN THE MOST DISDAINFUL SCRUTINY????

[enigmaestro]

Because, Karkat, the trick to hurting you? Is to never attack you.

Riddle that out.

[crab]

I'LL KILL YOU.
IF YOU GO THROUGH WITH WHAT YOU'RE IMPLYING.
I REALLY WILL.

[enigmaestro]

The dead usually return. But the experience of death? Oh, Karkat, that'll never fade.

Don't let this happen to your friends, won't you?

[crab]

[ karkat knows all too well the truth in what eddie says. it's been, what, a year? and karkat's death at eridan's hands still haunts him.

the truly upsetting part, though, isn't so much the threat of his friends dying; it's that -- it's already happened, with the vast majority of them. it's a failure karkat's already committed.

he can't even say anything before he disconnects. he doesn't trust himself to.

what has he gotten himself into? ]