♋ thirteenth.

[crab]

[private | kanaya maryam | text]
HEY.
OK THIS IS
I’M NOT REALLY SURE WHERE TO START, BUT I
I’M SORRY FOR IGNORING YOU, I JUST DIDN’T KNOW WHAT TO SAY.
I’M STILL NOT SURE WHAT TO SAY, TO BE PERFECTLY HONEST WITH YOU.
BUT MY SILENCE WASN’T A REFLECTION ON YOU OR MY SENTIMENTS TOWARDS YOU OR ANYTHING, I PROMISE.
I WAS SHUTTING OUT EVERYONE. EVEN GAMZEE.
I’M JUST
NOT SURE WHAT I’M SUPPOSED TO DO OR WHERE I’M SUPPOSED TO GO FROM WHERE I AM RIGHT NOW.
OK I’M TALKING IN CIRCLES RIGHT NOW, I ACKNOWLEDGE THAT.
I JUST DON’T WANT THINGS BETWEEN US TO CHANGE, KANAYA.
AND I THINK IN PART THE REASON WHY I HAVEN’T CONTACTED YOU SOONER IS THAT I’M AFRAID THAT, AFTER EVERYTHING THAT’S HAPPENED, IT’S INEVITABLE THAT THEY WILL.
THAT THEY PROBABLY ALREADY HAVE.
AND I CAN’T PREDICT IF AND HOW WE’RE GOING TO BE ABLE TO ADJUST.
THERE IS ONE THING I CAN SAY WITH CERTAINTY ISN’T GOING TO CHANGE THOUGH
I LOVE YOU TOO.

[private | nepeta leijon | text]
THERE IS ABSOLUTELY NO EXCUSE FOR THE WAY I’VE TREATED YOU
I DON’T EXPECT YOU TO FORGIVE ME, OR EVEN RESPOND TO THIS MESSAGE
AND I’LL SPARE YOU THE OVERWROUGHT SELF FLAGELLATION
I JUST WANTED TO SAY
EVEN THOUGH IT IS ESSENTIALLY WORTHLESS IN THE FACE OF MY GARGANTUAN, THROBBING ASSHOLE ATTRIBUTE
I’M SORRY.
I’M SO, SO SORRY.
YOU DON’T DESERVE ANY OF THE SHIT I’VE PUT YOU THROUGH.

[private | feferi peixes | text]
I OWE YOU AN APOLOGY.
MY OTHER SELF WAS AN INSUFFERABLE, UNREASONABLE BILGEPOT WITH HIS HEAD SO FAR UP HIS HINDQUARTERS HE WAS INCAPABLE OF EXCRETING ANYTHING BAR GALLONS UPON GALLONS OF SHIT FROM HIS DISGUSTING MAW.
EVIDENCED BY THE FACT THAT, AMONG OTHER THINGS, HE THOUGHT TELLING SOMEONE TO MURDER THEIR LUSUS WAS AN OK THING TO SAY
AND NOT THE BABBLING OF THE MOST ENORMOUS JERKWAD TO EVER GRACE THIS CITY’S POPULATION.

[private | eridan ampora | text]
I HAVE SAT HERE FOR THE BETTER PART OF TWENTY MINUTES ATTEMPTING TO FORMULATE AN APPROACH TO THIS GODAWFUL FUCKSPLOSION OF A FIASCO
AND I HAVE THOROUGHLY AND GLORIOUSLY FAILED.
I FAILED WITH SUCH FLARE AND SKILL THAT I AM EXPECTING OFFICIAL COMMENDATIONS FROM THE INTERNATIONAL PROFESSIONAL FAILURES ASSOCIATION AT ANY MOMENT NOW.
THERE IS NO METHOD OF APPROACHING THIS.
ALL I CAN THINK TO SAY
IS TO ASK YOU
WHAT THE ACTUAL CANKERBLASTING FUCK DO YOU HAVE TO SAY FOR YOURSELF???

[private | edward nygma | text]
THIS IS YOUR OFFICIAL NOTICE:
YOU AND I ARE THROUGH.
I WILL NOT BE SPYING FOR YOU ANY LONGER.
I WILL NOT BE ASSISTING YOU IN ANY CAPACITY ANY LONGER.
I WILL NOT BE HAVING ANYTHING TO DO WITH YOU ANY LONGER.
I’M *NOT* YOUR INVESTMENT.
AND JUST TO GIVE YOU A HEADS UP
I INTEND TO TELL ERIDAN EVERYTHING REGARDING OUR TIME WORKING TOGETHER.
I SURE HOPE I RANG FALSE, ALL THOSE TIMES I TOLD YOU YOUR PLANS WITH ME WOULD BLOW UP IN YOUR FACE!
DON’T SAY I DIDN’T WARN YOU.

Comments

[crab]

[ it takes him a long time to answer.

he hates it when she's right. ]

YEAH, BUT YOU SAID YOURSELF.
HE WASN'T ALL OF ME.
HE DIDN'T GIVE YOU THE WHOLE PICTURE.

[ DEFTLY AVOIDING THAT... SELF WORTH THING... ]

[glowsferatu]

No
He Didnt
But Hes Much Like Yourself In That Way
Or Did I Not Just Mention What Youre Now Thinking Without Saying

[crab]

LOOK
I KNOW YOU KNOW I HATE MYSELF.
EVERYONE KNOWS I HATE MYSELF.
*I* KNOW I HATE MYSELF.
AND IT MIGHT NOT MAKE SENSE TO YOU, OR TO ANYONE ELSE.
BUT THAT DOESN'T MEAN I CAN JUST SWITCH IT OFF.
IT'S NOT FOR NO REASON.
SOMETIMES I WONDER IF I'M THE ONLY ONE WHO FULLY COMPREHENDS THE EXTENT OF THE IMPACT MY MISTAKES HAVE HAD.
AND RECOGNIZES THE SIGNIFICANCE OF THE FACT THAT I KEEP MAKING THEM
OFTEN EVEN WHEN I'M AWARE IN ADVANCE THAT I'M GOING TO REGRET THEM.
MORE THAN THAT, I REALLY DON'T WANT TO BROACH THIS TOPIC WITH YOU RIGHT NOW, KANAYA.
IT'S TOO SOON.
I CAN'T DO IT.

[glowsferatu]

[ she just got him talking to her for the first time in a month, the last thing she needs is to push him into quitting the whole conversation. ]

Then We Dont Have To
But In Spite Or Perhaps Because Of The Fact You Cant Do It Yourself
And Even Should You Still Hurtle Towards Those Same Blunders Endlessly
Just Know That I Will Love You Either Way

[crab]

THAT'S ALL I EVER WANTED.

[glowsferatu]

But I Cant Pretend Its The Only Thing I Have To Offer Without Telling A Lie
Neither Can I Promise I Will Always Have The Prudence To Most Effectively Apply Whatever Else

[crab]

THAT'S FINE, DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT.
DO YOU WANT TO MEET UP IN PERSON NOW?

[glowsferatu]

Ill Be There In A Moment

[ and no sooner is the message sent than a knock comes at the door. the front door of the house, even. she decides this would be a bad time to barge in, even if her arrival was both solicited and announced. ]