shotyoudeadbang (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
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capeandcowl2011-07-06 02:41 am
shotyoudeadbang) wrote in capeandcowl2011-07-06 02:41 am
Entry tags:
[Video]
[A man in a strange one-eyed mask glares into the camera, studying it to make sure it's working. He looks singed up and it's possible he's still smoldering.]
All right, what's this horseshit? Seriously.
[His voice is hoarse, and he coughs a bit.]
I show up here, wherever the hell this is, against my will, some robot voice starts narrating some sci-fi crap to me, saying they're gonna try to enlist me as a damn peacekeeper for some planet that isn't even mine.
[A minor grunt of pain.]
So, naturally, I shoot up the joint and try to get whoever's jerkin' my chain to show himself, and I get about a million volts up my ass for my trouble. What, I'm NOT supposed to try and shoot whoever the hell's kidnapped me in the face? Last time I got shuffled off to another fucking planet, it ended ugly for the pricks who did it to me.
[Another groan, as his head falls into his hand.]
So I crawl my fried ass outside, only to get rolled up on by some two-bit cops who scoop me up and drop me in a holding cell in some dingy precinct that hasn't seen a mop since the 70s. Who do I gotta talk to to get the hell out of this joint and get a pack of smokes? I ain't about to pay prison prices for those things.
[His head thunks back against the gray brick wall behind him.]
And don't tell me we're having another goddamn "crisis." Even if that's true, don't tell me that shit. I'm sick of hearing about it.
All right, what's this horseshit? Seriously.
[His voice is hoarse, and he coughs a bit.]
I show up here, wherever the hell this is, against my will, some robot voice starts narrating some sci-fi crap to me, saying they're gonna try to enlist me as a damn peacekeeper for some planet that isn't even mine.
[A minor grunt of pain.]
So, naturally, I shoot up the joint and try to get whoever's jerkin' my chain to show himself, and I get about a million volts up my ass for my trouble. What, I'm NOT supposed to try and shoot whoever the hell's kidnapped me in the face? Last time I got shuffled off to another fucking planet, it ended ugly for the pricks who did it to me.
[Another groan, as his head falls into his hand.]
So I crawl my fried ass outside, only to get rolled up on by some two-bit cops who scoop me up and drop me in a holding cell in some dingy precinct that hasn't seen a mop since the 70s. Who do I gotta talk to to get the hell out of this joint and get a pack of smokes? I ain't about to pay prison prices for those things.
[His head thunks back against the gray brick wall behind him.]
And don't tell me we're having another goddamn "crisis." Even if that's true, don't tell me that shit. I'm sick of hearing about it.
voice
No such thing as pride, right?
voice
How 'bout you can the wisecracks and tell me what the hell's going on? Better yet, get me the hell out of this dump and THEN tell me what the hell's going on.
No, get me a pack of smokes, THEN get me the hell out of this dump and THEN tell me what the hell's going on. Where are the rest of the Six?
voice; 1/2
And. If I could, I'd be tearing you out of there the minute you made this post.
voice; 2/2
I kind of can't.
Voice
Voice
I might be in a similar situation as you. If you squint.
Voice
So, what, is this some new 'Salvation' deal? I still owe Rick Flag a murder for that crap last time.
Voice
Can't die, though. Probably the only real plus side compared to back home.
Voice
What the hell does that mean? You're immortal now? You strike some kinda deal with Etrigan and not tell us?
Voice
We already went down there to fetch Knockout? The card still existed?
Voice
We just got back from Hell. Knockout's still half out of it, and demons made Ragdoll look like a goth burn victim instead of that clown outfit.
Shit, are you telling me there's some timestream crap going on here?
Voice
Dimension, time, an amaglam of shoddy scifi elements or whatever. People filtering in and out like clockwork. Basically.
Voice
I hate everything.
Voice
When I get out―Waller be damned, but when I'm far, far away from that asylum and soon―I'm getting myself some conciliatory ice cream. You'd be welcome to join me.
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Can you at least tell me the name of the joint they locked you in?
[Because Floyd likely won't be held long and he'll need to know where to go to break Blake out, of course.]
Voice
[ Obviously. But, sadly, he'll be out within a week thanks to a different individual. Floyd's heroism must clearly wait another time. ]
Voice
[Pff. No calling it 'heroism' to his face if you ever want it to happen.]
Voice
[ Pause. ] Just what are you going to do here with no Six, no Squad?
Voice
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All right, "when" the hell are you from, if you're still having this little pickle about trying to get on the straight and narrow?
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