capeandcowl | Eighteenth Scuttle

[The camera turns on! It's Zoidberg's warehouse! He is sitting on his secondhand sofa alongside Aziraphale, who is sipping on a lovely cup of tea. Zoidberg has a dour expression on his tentacle-y face. Aziraphale is looking equally concerned.]

Friends and associates! Gather 'round and listen well! It is I, Zoidberg, with a dire warning for us all! I've been using my rowbutt-woman-given powers to investigate some suspicious individuals on the Network and I've successfully identified nineteen Skrulls in our midst! I am prepared to name names! Are you prepared to take action against these impostors?!

[He stands up, pulling a list of names from his lab coat pocket, then he clears his throat.]

Spider-Woman! You are a Skrull! As are you, Hikaru Sulu! Dick Grayson, Nepeta Leijon, and Cassie Holmes, Skrulls all! Goku! Harry Potter! Rachel! Ziggy Stardust! Nymphadora Tonks! Loki! Rapunzel! Lust! All devious shapeshifting aliens! Doctor Doom and Bullseye, too!

[He suddenly looks very somber.]

And two of my dearest companions have been deceiving us all this time! Parker Robbins and Calvin! Oh! How could you break my heart like this?!

[Zoidberg stifles a sob.]

And let it also be known that the one known as Bee-Pug is also a Skrull.

[Aziraphale has looked mildly concerned throughout all of this, and a moment after Zoidberg is done speaking, he appears thoughtful as he momentarily inventories the accused.]

Oh, I'm afraid that is only eighteen...

[A sinister look flashes across Zoidberg's face.]

Oh? Was it, Aziraphale? Was it?!

[He scuttles toward Aziraphale, lunging toward him with his claws in attack-postion-alpha! And suddenly: Aziraphale's arm has been cut clean off! The teacup he was holding flies through the air and there is some horrified hissing and screaming before Zoidberg turns back to the communicator and shuts it off.]

((ooc: Black is Zoidberg, blue is Aziraphale.))