voice;

[amoray]

[he doesn't start speaking right as the feed starts! there's a solid second or two of eridan trying to find his train of thought, the occasional heavy, expectant breath or two the only signs of his false starts.]

Well, Mexico was a shipload a fun. Don't know about anybody else's impromptu as fuck abscondin'.

Not my point of makin' this point though, so listen up, landlubbers.

[there is a decided lack of flair in eridan's voice, despite the (sharp, direct) pun/nautical reference or two. he's purposeful.]

They say they're cuttin' me loose soon, probably on account a my bein' such a charminly well-behawed prisoner and all. Due to personal circumstances, I'll be needin' to get a few affairs in order before my date a release.

I need a place to liwe, a tutor for the upcomin' schoolfeedin' year, and hopefully enough, some manner a profession. If you're willin' to hire a sewen solar sweep year old like myself, a course, don't want to go about misleadin' folk. Lyin' to 'em. Suchlike.

[a stale beat.]

No nosy hiwemates. Roommates, whatewer. I don't fuckin' like most a you and I probably won't giwe a shit about your problems, so keep your cartilage nubs outta mine. I got more than enough beetles in my coffers to keep me afloat for a while, so rent ain't gonna be an issue. Probably.

[a beat. he sounds like he means to say something dramatic or heartfelt to top off his posts like usual, and then:]

Preferably cat friendly. But I'm flexible.

Comments

[amoray]

I'm not. Not for that reason anyway, though I got plenty. I still think you're probably worse off for lack a my influence.

I just like takin' a stab or two at your... [wait what are they even called RIGHT] ...daddy issues.

[enigmaestro]

[Slowly narrows eyes.]

Are you now. Seems a little unclassy for someone of such alleged pedigree, don't you think?

[amoray]

What, mockin' the proles?

I thought that was a hallmark a all royalty, human or troll. The kind that remembers the differences between you and us, naturally.

[enigmaestro]

Oh, there are so many differences between you and me, Eridan, why limit yourself to fantasy?

[amoray]

Fantasy. Pffff. Do I gotta bring up the prince and the pauper argument a mine again?

I mean bein' enwious a my status, fine. Lots a folk are. But don't lie to yourself about it. And don't forget what sorta gene puddle you came from.

[enigmaestro]

Whatever puddle I came from is yet superior to your current state. I'll cut my losses.

But surely you've anticipated that reaction by now?

[amoray]

My current state? I got plenty a friends. Plenty a resources. and I got plenty a free time. With you no longer hangin' off my coattails, I got nowhere to go but up.

[enigmaestro]

[Maliciously:]

Should I tell you just how many times you rang false, or would you like to experience it for yourself?

[amoray]

[PSHHHHHHHHHH no he literally makes that exact noise, waving his hand dismissively.]

Should I let ewerybody know you hawin' those flashy lie detectin' powers a yours don't necessarily mean you can't lie?

[enigmaestro]

I never directly lie, Eridan. And I'm more than eager to speak in complete sentences for your numerous falsehoods.

[amoray]

Lies a omission, twistin' words, same fuckin' difference. I bet ewerybody would pay a lot more attention to your wordin' if they knew how much shit you pull on a regular basis.

[beat. malevolently:]

Or any a those secrets I been keepin' for you, moirail a mine.

[enigmaestro]

[A bitter pause. Eridan had him there, and they both knew it. When he spoke, it was quiet and measured.]

Ex-moirail.

Don't exaggerate, Eridan Ampora.

[amoray]

Ex. A course. It ain't like you hawen't replaced me already or anythin'.

[he knows he has eddie, he knows he holds fate in his hands just as sure as he did when he held his rifle to the throats of his flarp victims, but it isn't satisfying.

eridan can't help but somehow blame eddie for that lack of victory.]

I got you by the tail, Nygma. You and I know it.

[enigmaestro]

One would assume that someone in such an apparent upperhanded position would begin to make demands.

And yet, I hear nothing.

[amoray]

I don't want your fuckin' handouts.

I just want the satisfaction a knowin' that you know I got your life in my hands.

[enigmaestro]

Great. Lovely.

Satisfied yet?

[amoray]

[no.]

Sure.

I want Ninnian when I get out.

[enigmaestro]

Congratulating you on your release wasn't enough, now you want the cat as additional acknowledgment? We've already discussed his terms.

[amoray]

He's my cat, not yours. I'm gettin' him back.

[enigmaestro]

Falsehood.

[amoray]

If you ain't giwin' him back, I'm takin' him back.

Your choice.

[enigmaestro]

You assume I still have him.

[amoray]

I sure hope you do. Otherwise I'm gonna be breakin' into your house for nothin'.

[enigmaestro]

Well, I'm really glad you confessed that over the Network. Won't it be interesting if you do indeed, and that affects your probational evaluation?

Documented intention and all.

[amoray]

[GRINDING HIS TEETH yes it is completely audible on his end. at length:]

I want to see him. Make sure you hawen't had him stuffed.