capeandcowl | voice;

Entry tags:

eridan ampora | prince of hope

voice;

So what are you gonna do when they outlaw all that superheroin' nonsense you all lowe so damn much?

[to his credit, he's trying to sound grave. (it isn't working.)]

We take this - and we're goin' to, since we got such big pushers for mustard-bellied diplomacy in charge around here - they ain't gonna be satisfied 'til they got us all on leashes. And at the first signs a dissent, they're gonna hang us by 'em. I sure hope you lot can handle the usage a our powers bein' a criminal offense, since that's the next thing to go. A Wulcanus gun in ewery Natiwe hand and a trackin' chip in ewery filthy imPort, right?

[a ~~theatrical~~ pause. contrary to his usual habit of getting worked up in his tirades, eridan's been very calm (albeit smug in his "my unreasonable paranoia was entirely justified" kind of way) but no less intense throughout.]

We start goin quietly into that good fuckin' nocturnal phase and we aint newer gonna stop.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[awkward silence.]

Great. Look what you did now.

Okay, why the fuck is it my fault?

You shouldn't purposefully provoke falsehoods!

Like I fuckin' knew! You were such a shitty moirail I apparently couldn't tell in the first goddamn place.

[NOT TRUE...]

Falsehood.

Didn't think you were so easily persuaded by lesser bloods, Eridan. Or maybe Gamzee's bullshit is enough to overwhelm a feeble mind?

Don't bullshit me, Ed. When it came down to it, all I was good for was wipin' out a Dolwanian platoon or two to get you in nice with the upper echelons.

And one a these days Mitch ain't gonna hawe a use anymore either. Probably after you fuckin' lose it and start tossin' folk into your moronic fuckin' gimmicky death traps.

Falsehood on essentially every sentence you uttered from that loveless pair of sewage-born lips you possess -- but especially falsehood on my death traps, those are brilliance you can't even begin to comprehend. [YEAH HE'S BUTTMAD ABOUT THAT MOST]

Face it, Eridan, you fucked up. You wanted something that was wholly destructive for the both of us, something that could never be, and when I made the hard choice you just disintegrated.

Please, it's the most fuckin' contriwed shit I ewer saw.

[mocking:]

Oh, he's a sea dweller? I'll stick him somewhere arid, 'cos that is incredibly fuckin' original. He's got abandonment issues? I'll fuckin' make him see the people who done it - it's not like that's incredibly obwious or anythin', 'cos I'm a fuckin' creatiwe genius and I'm newer wrong.

[SCOFFING BECAUSE HE'S IGNORING THE ENTIRE LAST SENTENCE AND HOPING EDDIE DOESN'T NOTICE]

Got anythin' to say to that, you tacky fuckin' sociopathic Rube Goldberg knockoff?

That's not how my usual death traps run -- that's how your personalized would, because you can't handle the intellectual capacity of deducing a Holst piece from tiles on the floor between lethal electric shocks. You're an emotional creature, so it's more fair to play on your insecurity.

Then you'd at least have a fighting chance.

And don't think I'm letting you go on your whole ruining our relationship thing.

One, I don't need your fuckin' pity. If you're goin' to death trap me, you better goddamn do it right.

[beat. defensively:]

And I didn't ruin it.

The whole point of my traps is to test the individual, I'm not going to compose one that is well over your head for you. Where's the fun in that?

And yes you did. You wanted to change the meaning of the relationship, and I said no.

Comparin' sayin' no to what you actually ended up doin' is like comparin' gettin' irate with the barista for fuckin' up my latte to throwin' its scaldin' hot contents it in her face.

[both of which have happened.]

Answer me this, Ed: could you really kill me?

Eridan.

I could kill anyone I needed to.

Just like you.

Just like me.

[it comes out... uncomfortable. almost kind of conflicted on whether or not to be satisfied by that phrase.]

So there you are. Happy? You have your answers, your assurance.

Probably the only thing you can have now.

Yeah. Fine.

[beat.]

You want to talk shit, you make sure it's priwate or I'm hangin' up on you. And I know how much you hate bein' ignored.

Almost as much as you hate, right?

So. When are you getting a new moirail?

I don't need a moirail. Ain't worth the breakup.

[DEEPEST BLACK PITS OF BITTERNESS]

You miss the connection, surely? The deep meaning that only you are privy to?

I miss gougin' the eyes outta people who irritate me, too.

Doesn't mean I still hang onto habits that ain't no longer wieldy at this point a my life.

So, what then? Just the pursuit of kismeses and matesprits for you?

Apparently.

You people, you and her both - you did nothin' but make it worse anyhow.

[A beat.

A long beat.]

Maybe.

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