capeandcowl | ♋♈♍ text>>>video ♍♈♋

OKAY LISTEN UP CITY GOERS WE’VE GOT A
WIAT WHY AM I RED
FUCK
ARADIA HOW DO I CHANEGE IT
here is that right
WHY THE EVER LOVING FUCK IS THIS AN ISSUE I HAVE MORE IMPORTANT GRIEVANCNES TO ADDRESS THAN WHAT SHADE OF MONOCHROME THEY;RE PAINTED IN.
ok if you donts tatrt i will
FUCK YOU
I Still Say This Is
WAut I
Ufgh There
Renimd Me Agson Why Thsi Must Even Eb Brought TO Fruititon
guyssssss ); lets just use the webcam yorue pushing me
BOTH OF YOU SHUT THE HELL UP, I’M TLAKING HERE
im doing it
because im a girl of aciton
ARADIA DON’T YOU DO IT
IF YOU DO IT I WILL SHANK YOU ALL THE WAY BACK TO OUR CLUSTERDUCK OF A SESSION AND FEED YOU TO THE HORRORTERRORS.
Dont Maje Me Have To Sepsrate The Twwo Of Ou

[ the camera turns on to show all three of them looking like hot messes. aradia has taken down her hair and is clutching a pillow, makeup smeared down her face. she’s still wearing her nice red prom dress, but it’s hiked up to her waist and underneath is a pair of fluffy pyjama pants.

karkat is sporting a still-somewhat bleeding nose and a black eye. there are tear streaks on his face. his expression, though, is one of a troll on a mission.

kanaya’s hovering behind them, swaying slightly with an erratic and inconsistent glow, ready to swoop in the moment they look like they’re getting too volatile with each other. she’s clutching two phones in her left hand, aradia’s and karkat’s of course, like her unlife depends on it. not having taken the time to change out of her dress, she’s having to adjust her top every now and then. in hindsight, a strapless dress may not have been her best idea.

aradia gives a monumental half-sigh, half-snort, and slings an arm around karkat’s shoulders ] No, okay, you know what? You know what? Let’s just, like. I mean, screw him! Right? I mean, not screw him, but-- like, in a bad way! [ kanaya’s quick to interject ] Yes, p-p-please refrain from...“sssscrewing him”, if the imp-p-p-plications of that term are [ -hic!- ] anything like I...susssspect them to be.

[ flustered, karkat is going to raise his voice, which is rather slurred, over the top of both of them. ] Okay, you both need to shut your gaping failmaws right now, you’re completely ruining what sad, struggling surviving atmosphere was left after that disaster of an opening!

[ -hic!- ] Your idea, I sh-should...remind you.

[ deep breath and puffing himself up as though his next words are all important. which they are. ] Julian Keller!

[ aradia mumbles something which is probably an echo of that, and points slightly to the left of the screen, less intensely than she intended. she’s starting to feel a little sick. kanaya’s eyes could not possibly roll any harder. karkat could not look any more indignant. ]

We’re calling you out, douchenozzle, so strap yourself in and sit tight because we have a bone to pick with you. Several bones, in fact, belonging to our since decomposed tolerance for your gratuitous arrogant horseshit. You’ve crossed a line, and tonight the consequences must be faced- a face- so ugly that... a pocket dimension had to be created to house the vomit expunged in the face of it. Like your face. Your really, really hateful and gross face.

Karkat’s right. You really go too far, you know, with your, your, horseshit, and chiseled jaw, and everything!

Can we please focus on the [ -urp!- :o ] horseshit and leave whatever duuubious qualites of his j-jaw out of this?

Yeah let’s not talk about his completely unattractive jaw and- and- stupid self satisfied smirk--

[ kanaya just linefaces at him ]

He’s just awful, okay? He’s just stupid and awful, and, and, ugh! [ she looks to be losing her focus, and her face looks more than a little green. her speech starts slurring even more ] Hey, did you, did you have anything else to say? I think I’m gonna hurl.

Oh my god if you throw up on me I swear to awful dead Troll God I will turn you inside out and scrape every last repugnant drop back into your digestive sack where it belongs.

[ kanaya throws up her hands and stumbles offscreen ] Should I find you a more [ -hic!- ] desirable...reccceptacle, or would you p-p-prefer I [ -hic!- ] accompany you to the...load gaper?

I’m just gonna... [ she hiccups and sticks a hand over her mouth, before batting at the keyboard aimlessly ] Karkat turn it off, I’m gonna hurl right now!

[ a glowing hand reaches in and pulls her by the arm offscreen ] Not on my bed! Come alooong, now.

[ karkat jumps to his feet and away from her and any vomit trajectories, dropping the comm in the process. it turns off when it hits the floor. ]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

What happened?

I had mentioned extinction, hadn't I? Our world was destroyed, that was something we couldn't expect to prevent, it would have occurred whatever actions we had taken.

But there were contingencies, allowances for repopulation. The loss of these measures we are not so blameless for.

Still you're pretty young to have to be responsible for repopulating a whole world. That's not really something they should expect kids to do.

There was no one else remaining to accomplish such an action. I was prepared to do so from the very beginning, it was my purpose. The failure was mine.

You have the chance to populate your race here.

No, we don't. I just told you that our contingencies were destroyed. Our methods of reproduction differ from your own, and a brood cannot be produced without a Mother Grub. They're all dead, and due to my failure, there will be no more following.

Moreover, our already limited numbers are only further complicated by the biological reorientations resulting upon the arrival of a certain percentage among our number.

O-oh. [She understood about half of that but she can tell none of it was good. She shifts uncomfortably.] Sorry. That really sucks.

There's no need to be. It was my own failure that brought it about, not yours.

Yeah but... Uh, yeah. [She lapses into awkward silence without anything to say.]

I think I'd like to discuss a different subject, if you don't mind.

Yeah. So, uh, your friends feeling better from the alcohol?

Well, Aradia's sickness was hopefully temporary, but I will continue monitoring that situation to ensure it doesn't end in repetition.

Karkat is...still shouting about something or other, but that isn't a rubric by which his mood can be accurately measured.

So he's always a brat?

Not the phrase I would employ. [ he is her best friend, after all ] He simply has a formidable quantity of emotions.

If you say so. He reminds me of my little brother, if you ask me.

[ she would say the exact same thing if the whole concept weren't so inherently alien to her ]

Oh? What qualities do you find them to share?

Being mouthy, slightly annoying, the already mentioned brat thing.

[She says it a little fondly. All annoyances aside, she really loved her brother.]

He expresses such a high degree of hate largely to avoid any large-scale recognition of the degree to which he truly cares.

That's so like a boy.

I find it rather sweet, personally. He has such a quantity of defensiveness, justified though it may have been at one time. He's a darling, really.

I dunno about darling, but it's okay. In small doses.

He has particular duties that require his residence to be separated from ours, so I tend to treasure the opportunities we are allowed more frequently.

Well, yeah. I guess if you're not around someone it makes it easier to see the good stuff instead of the annoying parts.

Or, rather, it motivates you to see beyond the annoying aspects and to more easily tolerate them. Perhaps to recognize the motivations behind their employment, as well.

Employment? It's not a job.

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