VIDEO

[heartlessglitch]

[ the robot named danger is unamused. there is what appears to be a golden basketball-shaped thing with wings and a long tail nestled on top of her head in her cable-dreads. judging by the way she folds her arms pointedly over her chest, it doesn't please her. ]

I require assistance.
My database lacks references for proper maintenance of this creature.
His classification is "golem."
I cannot remove him.
And he will not stop putting his mouth on my projects.

[ a pause. ]

Alternatively, you may answer this inquiry:
Where is Cross Marian?

Comments

voice;

[waiting]

Last time I saw the guy, we were in another universe. How long has he been gone?

[ considering his conversation with lil, or what he can remember of it, he's suddenly a lot more unsure about danger, not that he lets it show. ]

[heartlessglitch]

I am unsure.
Perhaps that would be a better question for his mistress.

[waiting]

I don't think I've ever met her.

[crab]

[ robo bff it's been a while. ]

PRETTY SURE THE CORRECT CLASSIFICATION IS "NUISANCE".

[heartlessglitch]

[ too long adorable troll bff ]

Also accurate.
I would welcome useful advice, Karkat Vantas.

video;

[futureleader]

Have you tried shutting it off?

[heartlessglitch]

I am a highly advanced artificial intelligence.
Such an obvious solution has occurred to me.

[video]

[girlverine]

[That image is enough to even make Laura smile. Faintly.]

Perhaps that is how the creature learns?

[She has seen stranger things.]

[heartlessglitch]

Possible.
However, that does not make his behavior less irritating.

text;

[soulbonder]

while i do not know much about golems

perhaps it is hungry
or bored

have you tried giving it toys

[heartlessglitch]

I don't possess any toys.

video;

[professorlionface]

He's probably hungry. Let me cook something up and I can try to lure him out of your hair. ...Literally.

You haven't seen Cross either?

[heartlessglitch]

That would be appreciated.
And no, I have been unable to contact Cross.
It is possible that he has been returned home.

video;

[topslug]

I'm afraid I can't help with finding your friend, or the golem. He does seem very cute, though.

[ However, this isn't a social call. ]

Correct me if I'm wrong, but are you the warden for NOHoPE?

[heartlessglitch]

Yes.
That is one of my current primary functions.
Please clarify the purpose of your inquiry.

permavoice;

[uzi]

That idiot.

[heartlessglitch]

I assume you are referring to Cross Marian.
Is this an indicator that you are aware of his whereabouts?

[video]

[notadartboard]

Oh hell. That's Cross's...thing.

[thinking]

But if he's still here, that means the dumbass isn't ported out.

[heartlessglitch]

That could be.
However, that still leaves a variety of possible fates.
None of which are particularly conducive to having Timcampy returned home.

[video]

[oedipusrat]

He's gone again? Poor Timcampy must be out of...it's strange little mind. I believe Mister Marian has said it eats anything, so you probably shouldn't let it devour your projects. And that it absorbs information if you leave the television on. Like most people, I suppose. Although who knows how well he'll behave without his owner around.

[heartlessglitch]

Acknowledged.
I will attempt the solution you have suggested to me.
At the very least, I would prefer letting him eat the television instead of my projects.

[ a small pause ]

I assume you are a friend of Cross Marian's.

[themisfit]

I do not know Herr Marian particularly well. It will no shock that I'm stumped on the matter.

Perhaps the creature can be stored somewhere while you work.

[heartlessglitch]

[ pointedly: ]

Timcampy possesses some degree of sentience.
I do not wish to "store" him.

video; private;

[not_really_charlie]

[Hello strange robot woman.]

Sounds like you need a hacker... [And Charlie is one of the best around. All the more with her powers - mentally interfacing with technology comes in handy.]

video; private;

[heartlessglitch]

On the contrary, I have a personal aversion towards hackers.
The reason for that should be obvious.