VIDEO.

[heartlessglitch]

[ The camera clicks on to reveal a scene at the Institute's basement laboratories. It's the usual mess of mechanical miscellanea. There's the usual blue robot in view-- or is there? The being on the feed is definitely mechanical, but visibly masculine and dressed in what appears to be a priest's vestments.

When danger's voice comes, it's from off camera. ]

Inquiry: Have there been a significant number of incidents involving form alteration within the past twenty-four to forty-eight hours?
If so, what progress has been made towards identifying the source?

[ A pause, as she comes into view, moving to stand behind the other robot. She eyes him skeptically for a moment before speaking a touch impatiently: ]

It is impossible to run diagnostics while you are so needlessly dressed, Kirei.
I cannot access the relevant ports.

[ The second figure in question turns his head, regarding her neutrally. He has responded to 'Kirei', and perhaps by a stretch there could be a visible similarity drawn between the unfeeling metal shown on the video feed and the human flesh and blood that one would usually associate with that name, but it is slight.

What gives him away the most is the vestments, and he shows no intention of budging on that. ]

Concern is unnecessary. I am operating within standard procedures. Self diagnostics have returned normal.

Additionally: your request is inappropriate.

Inappropriate by the standards of the humans who have clearly indoctrinated you, I suppose.

[ Her tone is mildly judgmental, and she gives no warning before unceremoniously jerking up the back of his clothes. Reaching over her own shoulder, she chooses one long cable from her hair and promptly plugs herself in.

To the camera: ]

I will await responding Network reports.
The second opinion of a mechanic or technopath would also be somewhat helpful.

Initiating interface.

[ And the feed cuts. ]

Comments

[heartlessglitch]

I have adapted to my experiences by often defaulting to distrust.

[ a beat. then carefully: ]

Who is it that you are classifying as my friend?

[enigmaestro]

The very man -- or, is machine more apt? -- who claims you are possessive of him.

[heartlessglitch]

Kirei and I are not friends.

[ another pause ]

And I am not possessive of him.

[enigmaestro]

Are you testing for falsehoods?

[heartlessglitch]

[ impatiently now: ]

I am being genuine when I say that we are not friends.
You are aware of this.
Our relationship is strained, to say the least.

[enigmaestro]

Goodness, Danger dear, I daresay I detect a touch of fresh emotion from you. Could it be that I'm hitting a circuit?

These definitions must be important to you. Friend over acquaintance over -- well, perhaps something else?

[heartlessglitch]

Clarify what you are implying.

[enigmaestro]

I'm simply saying, I can see why you wouldn't want to leap into any romantic entanglements so soon.

[heartlessglitch]

Our relationship is not romantic.
In fact, that is impossible.
Even if I were to have feelings for Kirei, he is incapable of reciprocation.

[enigmaestro]

Are you saying he's a sociopath? It really sounds like that's the logical leap, my dear, you know people don't take such diagnosis lightly.

[heartlessglitch]

[ a bit testily at first: ]

I am saying he has claimed to be unable to experience certain emotions.
Including those emotions which would be required for a mutually romantic relationship.

[ a beat, then perhaps skeptically: ]

Are you teasing me?

[enigmaestro]

Really. [His tone indicates something born of smugness and amusement. Clearing his throat but once, he spoke softly:] What would I have to gain, Danger, from teasing you so?

[heartlessglitch]

I am unsure.
But I would assume that your interest in the nature of my relationship with Kirei is not out of friendly concern.

[enigmaestro]

Perhaps my concern is subjugated to metamorphosis. It isn't as if I don't care about you, in some regard.

It's just not an emotional sort of caring.

[heartlessglitch]

Which is, of course, part of the reason I simply cannot trust you.
Although that does not necessarily mean I believe avoiding emotional investment is unwise.
Admittedly, it is sometimes comforting, to know that Kirei will never be able to use his affection as a weapon against me.

[enigmaestro]

Of course. [He drawls.] It must be of great comfort. That begets, what -- well, if not a sense of trust then one of great dependency. Predictability.

Though I predict he won't like hearing this.

[heartlessglitch]

You assume too much, Edward.
It is entirely possible that he will not care.

[enigmaestro]

True, true, he might not care.

Right now.

But what about when he manifests as normal again? Assuming he does, mind, this is all hypothetical. But. What if?

[heartlessglitch]

Then it is just as well.
He and I have personal issues to discuss.
If we are unable to come to a proper resolution, then perhaps I will attempt to reconsider the priority status of our relationship.

[enigmaestro]

I love how you phrase causation and effect -- so formally. It's almost like reading the abstract of a dissertation.

I won't make bets against your deduction, however. Don't want to be patronizing.

[heartlessglitch]

You don't wish to be patronizing?
Remarkable.
Perhaps I should document this moment for further study.

[enigmaestro]

You know, that was actually rather funny. You're charming as a comedian, Danger, I think we should expose more of that winking talent of yours.

[heartlessglitch]

Thank you.
I have, in fact, been developing my humor cores.
I find that cultural differences sometimes prevent humans from understanding my jokes, however.

[enigmaestro]

Perhaps it's a cultural difference. Or perhaps you're simply more highbrow than most of them?

[heartlessglitch]

That would be a difficult claim to make.
In terms of age, I am the equivalent of a human adolescent.
I have a significant degree of development to achieve before I would consider myself a rarefied intellectual.
I am, however, extremely competent.

[ a beat. ]

Though perhaps slightly less so with humor.