voice;

[amoray]

So.

Any a you ewer had a nemesis before? Like fated fuckin' contentiousness, always gettin' up each others' gills doin' shit just to irritate 'em, duelin' to practically the death, maybe makin' out a little, that kinda thing.

See, I'm in the market for just that particular arrangement, and while I'm personally a master of the bellicose arts and don't need any adwice or nothin', I obwiously got a wested interest in how humans go about poorly imitatin' the quadrant. What with my bein' the main troll-human confidante in these parts and such.

[he pronounces it "con-fee-dawn-tay". also he means intermediary.]

Despite most of you bein' from a society bearin' a sewerely inferior romance system and therefore gettin' your emotions all scrambled up wrong from the get-go 'cos of it, I'd appreciate hearin' some personal tales.

Comments

video; encrypted

[enigmaestro]

Hey, how do you think I feel? Joker But With Teenage Hormones is hitting on me.

Seriously, I'm all for emotional manipulation, but some things -- Eridan, some things I just am not prepared to endure.

video; encrypted

[amoray]

He's -


what?

video; encrypted

[enigmaestro]

You -- [Face. Frozen.]

You had to have known. I'm sure he's doing it purely to agitate me -- the parallels are endless.

video; encrypted

[amoray]

What the fuck do you mean he's hittin' on you?

[though he has no actual public right and/or claim over deciding whether or not his notfriends can hit on eddie anymore ITS STILL DISTRESSING]

video; encrypted

[enigmaestro]

I thought you had figured it out already! [He draws back, clearly uncomfortable. And clearly very aware what would happened if Eridan was denied explanation.] It's hardly worth a second thought, really. Gamzee has been "waxing black" for me, though I suspect my case isn't unique at all in that respect. If you hadn't noticed, he's "waxing" more than a martial arts movie.

video; encrypted

[amoray]

Why's he waxin' in the first place?

[sharp, accusatory; it's an uncomfortable topic for him too, though not so much that he'd avoid it entirely. because not being jealous is difficult.]

video; encrypted

[enigmaestro]

No.

No, no, no, this isn't my fault. Oh, no. If anything, it's your fault! Because it started when we were moirails, that's when it started, and I wouldn't have encountered him so directly if not for you!

[clearly a defense that will work wonders]

video; encrypted

[amoray]

Oh, so it's my fault 'cos ewen bein' associated with me got his attention. That's my fault.

[ALREADY GOING BAD PLACES]

video; encrypted

[enigmaestro]

[HE BITES DOWN ON HIS LIP.

BECAUSE HE'S SWALLOWING A FALSEHOOD.]

What else could have beget it?

video; encrypted

[amoray]

Well I am incredibly fuckin' sorry you ewer got to know me, then.

[EDDIE U IN THE DANGA ZONE]

video; encrypted

[enigmaestro]

[oh


no]

No -- I -- no. That's not what I meant! I just meant it wasn't my fault, and it's really more your fault, but I still like you!

All right, a moment. That isn't the tone I wanted to set, really. It's only because he wanted exactly this, what's happening right now, between us. Look at us! Fighting nonsensically over nonsense! It's beneath you and I both. That was probably his dirty scheme the entire time, Eridan, do you want Gamzee to win?

video; encrypted

[amoray]

You know, shocker of shockers, I can actually tell when you're tryin' to misdirect me with random bullshit.

Mostly 'cos I'm currently in the process of giwin' him the impression that you ruined my fuckin' life and he's got no clue a otherwise enough to be schemin' ower it, you righteous goddamn tool.

video; encrypted

[enigmaestro]

Oh right, because Gamzee has always believed everything you've fed him, how could I forget?

Either he's waxing black because of my natural charm, or he's up to something. There's no third option, so I'll be the gentleman and let you choose.

video; encrypted

[amoray]

You know, maybe - and don't go quotin' me on this or anythin', partner in crime a mine - but maybe he's just waxin' black for you because you're a fuckin' prick.

[oh no he's in A Mood now]

video; encrypted

[enigmaestro]

Really, Eridan, am I in a minority with that descriptor? Is he chasing after all of them?

video; encrypted

[amoray]

Whatewer. You deal with him.

Since I wouldn't want to go muckin' up your social life any more than I already hawe.

video; encrypted

[enigmaestro]

Eridan.

[Long, measured exhale. But he knows he has to.

He knows he must.]

If I could have so easily dealt with him, I would have. I could use your -- [Eddie clears his throat, strums his fingers along the communicator's back.] Help.

video; encrypted

[amoray]

Mmhm?

[a question without actually being a question - his claws click, uncomfortably loud, against the communicator's speaker.]

video; encrypted

[enigmaestro]

Look, if it was the difference between knowing you and in turn dealing with this utter discomfort and enjoying the absence of both?

I would choose you.

Okay?

[He folds his arms, sulking into the camera.]

When I say I could use your help, it's not out of pity or pandering or propriety. It's because you're competent and I need you.

video; encrypted

[amoray]

Fine. Whatewer. You got a plan, are we comin' up with somethin' right fuckin' now, what?

You're goddamn lucky I'm so fuckin' generous and forgiwin', by the by.

video; encrypted

[enigmaestro]

Do you think he'll act on anything? What with his moirail. That should restrain him, right?

video; encrypted

[amoray]

If he's actually buyin' into it, then you probably got nothin' to worry about. Kar wouldn't go lettin' his moirail pursue somebody who pisses him off as much as you do.

You just better hope Kar's decent at this shooshin' business.

video; encrypted

[enigmaestro]

This is ludicrous.

video; encrypted

[amoray]

You'll liwe.

video; encrypted

[enigmaestro]

I suppose so.









You were jealous, just now.