voice;

[amoray]

So.

Any a you ewer had a nemesis before? Like fated fuckin' contentiousness, always gettin' up each others' gills doin' shit just to irritate 'em, duelin' to practically the death, maybe makin' out a little, that kinda thing.

See, I'm in the market for just that particular arrangement, and while I'm personally a master of the bellicose arts and don't need any adwice or nothin', I obwiously got a wested interest in how humans go about poorly imitatin' the quadrant. What with my bein' the main troll-human confidante in these parts and such.

[he pronounces it "con-fee-dawn-tay". also he means intermediary.]

Despite most of you bein' from a society bearin' a sewerely inferior romance system and therefore gettin' your emotions all scrambled up wrong from the get-go 'cos of it, I'd appreciate hearin' some personal tales.

Comments

[aggressiveapathy]

Our.

[enigmaestro]

You work for me, so yes, I am playing the transitive property here. Our.

[aggressiveapathy]

You guys need to status update your facebook relationships more. Fine. Our life would be more exciting with an America's Next Top Nemesis competition in it.

[enigmaestro]

Oh, you took this in a direction that I'm not sure I like. [What a drama queen, he totally digs it.] But I'm remaining open-minded: are you already scheming the schematics?

[aggressiveapathy]

I thought of it like two seconds ago. So, yeah.

[spoiler: the loses will go home by being set on fire.]

[enigmaestro]

[already has eddie's approval]

Pitch it. He's clearly desperate enough, anyway.

[aggressiveapathy]

I'll need about a million dollars. Up front. To bribe people to try out.

[enigmaestro]

He has the money.

[aggressiveapathy]

Wow. I don't charge him enough rent.

[enigmaestro]

He hasn't discussed these details with you? His source of income?

How else would he afford private school?

[aggressiveapathy]

He goes to school.

[April is the best adult. Clearly.]

[enigmaestro]

Question. Does he technically have a legal guardian now or not?

[aggressiveapathy]

I didn't sign anything.

[enigmaestro]

Well that's just great.

[aggressiveapathy]

So? There's like five million kids who aren't anyone's problem in this place.

[Eddie she's not ready to be a mom.]

[enigmaestro]

As long as you defined personal responsibility.

[aggressiveapathy]

I'm not responsible. That's the point. Why does he need an adult anyway?

[enigmaestro]

He's actively trying to engage a discussion about nemeses. How is this not proof?

[amoray]

Can you piss off with all this creepy fuckin' stalkin' shit?

[YOU BETTA BELIEVE HE'S FOLLOWING ALL THESE CONVERSATIONS ABOUT HIMSELF]

I'm doin' just fuckin' fine on my own, thanks.

[enigmaestro]

It's cute that you honestly believe that.

[amoray]

Beliewe it or not, me and Fel and Mitch got liwes outside a bein' inwolwed with you.

And I say us three 'cos we're the only ones who could ewer fuckin' stand you in the first place.

[enigmaestro]

[Tersely:] Why are you including yourself in a group of people who still hold meaning to me?

[Busted. If he didn't call it out, someone else would, and then where would their facade be!]

[aggressiveapathy]

Mm. I see how that's totally worse than the stupid questions the adults ask here.

[enigmaestro]

Whose side are you on?

[aggressiveapathy]

The guy I work for.

[Beat. She just doesn't know what you want here, Eddie. So...]

But if I get a kid I'm taking maternity leave.