◘ voice ◘ 20

[hacktivist]

Is it time yet to make an annual announcement against the ritual consumerist orgy that boosts corporate capital at the expense of the general welfare of individuals and their meagre finances?

'Time flies' is the expression, I believe.

Don't expect presents. I won't.

[Private; encrypted to hypnosymphony]

[an awkward pause, then a very rehearsed, like he's been working on wording it for a while]

I apologize for breaking into your apartment. Next time I will call ahead.

30 ⊗ voice

[professorlionface]

Two years. Hmm.

It's funny how retrospect recolors it. It's never what you've actually done that stands out the most, but what you haven't. There's always a greater amount you feel you should have accomplished, harder you could have tried, more you might have helped.

It's tiring, hindsight.

[He pauses, wishing there was a conclusion he could have added to this, but he doesn't have one. Instead he ends up just clicking off the comm. ]

( Avengers filter )

Episode 1x01 (Video)

[forgottoinflect]

One, two, testing... Is this working?

[a critical squint, followed by a brief moment of camera adjustment away from himself and a scan of the city and the going-ons of its citizens as he narrates over it]

Ah, yes. Ahem. This is a message to Troy, Annie, Jeff, etc. you know who you are. Or anyone else who may be aware of the whereabouts of the individuals by these names, or are aware of the whereabouts of people who are aware of the whereabouts of the above description. I'm not sure of the circumstances I'm dealing with here. Further details available upon request.

If you know who I am and are watching this and are not Britta nor Professor Duncan- I would like confirmation if this is similar to the time I imagined everything in stop animation, because I am comfortably over those issues and currently unaware of any others, and it's not December 9th yet although it is suddenly closer to the 9th than it was yesterday. Which is usually how time progresses, but I hope this isn't one of those episodes where I've gone into a coma and have woken up months or years later with amnesia only to find that all of my friends have died and only I'm alive to experience this new superhero-blessed universe. But if that's the case, you wouldn't be here to tell me otherwise.

If you don't know who I am and are watching this- I am Abed. I don't suspect I'll be here very long, because these sorts of things are usually corrected by the end of the episode, but I am interested in a demonstration of these super powers I've been told exist. Laser eyes, web-shooting, flying, you know the drill. And if somebody happens to have a similar get up or gimmick as Spider-Man (any version) I will gladly ignore copyright if you can wish my friend Troy a happy day-he's-not-supposed-to-celebrate-because-he's-Jehovah's-Witness. On camera if he's not here.

[camera turns back to himself, unblinking stare for a few awkward seconds before the feed cuts]

Δ1 [Video/Action]

[redshifting]

[Video]

*You see a city from the air. In fact, some of you might well recognize it as the City, unparalleled in its grandeur. Of course, on the screen the City seems to be getting larger. No, wait, the communicator is falling-- and you might be able to hear a young woman's surprised yell right beside it.* Whoaaaaaaaaaah!

The ground is coming up pretty fast. And then, it's right there--* Oof! *--the feed cuts.*

[Action]

*Hey, you. Yeah, you. Wherever you are in the City, walking around, minding your business, even inside at work or school...

...you might hear the sound of someone yelling. A woman, if you're particularly astute. And it's getting louder.*

--oooooooooooooooooaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!!

*The noise is coming higher up-- And the source? A young woman in a black leotard quite literally falling from the sky above you.

She shows no sign of stopping as she smashes into the ground nearby, quite literally bouncing once or twice from the impact.* Oof!

*Alternatively, if you're inside, she just smashed into the side of the building right next to a window. Same situation, really.*

Ow, ow, ow! That one really hurt!

► 038.

[culver]

[See Nill. See Nill and Damian. See Nill and Damian sitting at a picnic table somewhere in Central Park. They’re bundled up for the winter, and Damian has what appears to be a map spread out before them. He’s pointing things out, muttering and then looking up every so often to glance at Nill.]

Are you getting this?

[And as often as he is glancing up, she is nodding, actually paying great attention to the map and everything he’s mumbling. She has one hand on his arm, and is presumably responding to what he’s saying. Except since, you know, nobody but Damian can hear it, the scene probably looks mildly hilarious to anyone else.

After a particularly elaborate series of gestures, Damian scrunches his face and then throws up his hands in frustration.]

Tt. This isn’t working. I was right—we’re going to need a live demonstration.

[Nill rolls her eyes in response, though she can’t hide her smile. The eye-roll is just for show. But she nods in agreement anyway.

Damian leans over his communicator—since Nill’s is the one currently on—and begins to type rapidly. After a moment he holds it up to Nill for her approval.

She inspects what he’s typed, and reaches out to poke out a few fixes. But then he gets the Nill Nod of Approval and she leans back, looking confident.]

You are hereby challenged invited to participate in a war mock war, this coming Friday. The games shall last until there is a winner. (Or until we decide to stop.) The weapons will be anything you care to bring snow. Like snowballs.

The purpose of this is to prepare should the City ever fall under siege again. (We hope that does not happen.) It will probably happen soon.

We shall meet at the central court of the park, at dawn ten am. Further rules will follow this post. (But it is really just for fun.)

Be prepared.